Trying to conceive

[beautyfromathistle]

Hi everyone, I need your expertise
I’m 34 y/o 5’1 and my weight is 200 lbs
I’ve a 4 year old daughter when I had her I used to weight around 140 lbs.
Anyhow I’ve been trying to convince for a year and half now with no luck both my husband and I have good lab results and my US showed no abnormalities.
My ob/gyn called this secondary infertility due to weight gain he suggested that I should probably try to lose weight then try again. What do you think ?

 

[leolady77]

@beautyfromathistle It's possible but doctors will blame everything on weight gain. I assume you're menstruating regularly, do you know if you are ovulating each month? It is actually possible to have periods without ovulating with PCOS and other conditions. You can buy LH (luteinizing hormone) test strips you can use for the days leading up to your ovulation to make sure you're having sex on the right days. You've only got a 48hr window from ovulation to conceive each month. If you aren't seeing LH levels rise on the strips, tell your doctor so they can see what else might be going on.

 

[sg1371]

@beautyfromathistle I'm heavy. I'm 33 now . I got pregnant at 316lbs at 32yo .. I was never able to get pregnant before .. and well I tried the conception for her vitamins from amazon .. tracked ovulation and used pre-seed during my fertil days .. I got pregnant on my second month trying after taking one bottle of vitamins and using the lube .. it worked for me

 

[laika]

@beautyfromathistle I’m your same height and weight and it took me a year to get pregnant, but I think that was mostly due to PCOS and not my weight. I have had doctors say losing weight could help, but my weight fluctuated in the year I was trying and I was at my heaviest when I had success so I don’t know...

 

[cidalia]

@beautyfromathistle Sometimes the stress of wanting it so much can take a toll also, try watching your ovulation cycle and make sure your not having s*x or him relieving himself for two to three days before your ovulation so it’s more potent.
I’m 31, 5,2 and 290 lbs and got pregnant. Your weight doesn’t affect it as much as they want you to think.

 

[sebastian589]

@beautyfromathistle There’s no way for him to know that for sure. You could just be experiencing good ole secondary infertility.

I personally haven’t looked into this but I would look into the positive and negative impacts of weight loss. Sometimes if you lose weight it can disrupt your fertility.

 

[supersenior]

@beautyfromathistle IVF mama here to say that my fertility doctor never mentioned my weight or BMI as a relevant factor.

I'd really recommend getting a second opinion from a size inclusive doctor, and if your insurance doesn't require referrals then I'd suggest going straight to a fertility clinic.

There are so many things that could be going on that chalking it up to weight gain is just plain lazy, especially when you've only gained 60lbs. I can see it being a factor if you'd gained more than 100, but even then... If you're ovulating regularly, don't have ovarian cysts showing up on your ultrasound, and your estrogen levels are normal, then it's unlikely the extra weight is the culprit.

Feel free to DM me if you have any questions about how to find a good fertility clinic in your area, how to navigate insurance, what to expect, etc. I know it can feel super overwhelming and I'm so sorry you're in this boat and are being dismissed by your doctor.

ETA: The reason we did IVF was entirely male factor due to a genetic condition. I'm 5'2" and was 260lbs before pregnancy and ended up responding beautifully to the IVF meds and got pregnant on our first embryo transfer.

 

[apolcraig2010]

@beautyfromathistle It can’t be determined definitively if your weight is causing the secondary infertility. I have a dear friend at a normal weight and she has it, too. It’s true much is blamed on weight. I am over 270lbs and I got pregnant three times very easily (within 3 rounds). I did have two miscarriages first and now I am 22weeks. My doctors never blamed my weight for the miscarriages. They did say better glucose control would help me hold on to my pregnancies. It’s worth noting that between those 3 pregnancies I did pass over the line into full blown diabetes. So there’s that. I’m on insulin and things are going very well now. I’d suggest you get full bloodwork done: lipids/cholesterol, A1C and fasting glucose, WBC, etc. Sometimes bloodwork can point to something.

 

[adthrive]

@beautyfromathistle All I can offer is anecdote! I am obese, aged 36 and my husband is 2 years younger than me and very fit. I also am missing one ovary. We tried for over a year a just assumed the problem was me because of all my factors. After seeking fertility help, it turned out his sperm count was low, completely unexplained. We ended up getting pregnant eventually. Just wanted to share that fertility has many factors but can also be totally random.

 

[beautyfromathistle]

Thank you all for your helpful replies.
I’m not from the US and where I live we relay on free public healthcare system but unfortunately with a long waiting time for referrals, and if I like to accelerate things I’d probably have to go to private clinics which cost millions of .

Anyhow I’ve learned few things from all of you.
1- To ask for a referral to a fertility specialist not a general ob/gyn.
2- To track ovulation dates and to try the ovulation strips ( my first pregnancy was unplanned so this’s news to me ).
3- Pre-seed lubricants .
4- fertility supplements.
5- Husband tests and more screening.

and to be patient