Teen turning 18 in a few years! 😱

[corydm27]

What are your thoughts on kicking your teens out when they turn 18?

Does the decision change depending on whether they are attending college/tech school or not?

What new dynamics/boundaries have you set with your new adults?

I'm not telling you about my specific teen because I don't want that to influence your responses.

Edit: For the record, I simply realized I haven't thought about this. I haven't done anything either way. Just gathering opinions.

 

[tomkuruz1212]

@corydm27 We're in the middle of a housing crisis in our city. A single bedroom apartment under 500 square ft is 2 grand/month.

My kid can stay home until he can actually afford to not be homeless.

 

[lorna717]

@tomkuruz1212 This right here.

How can kids these days even afford to move out?

What we want as parents for our kids is a successful launch for them (where they can be able to sustain themselves financially and pay for their housing, food and clothes) not a launch directly into homelessness.

 

[tchew]

@corydm27 I would never demand or ask that my kid leave our home, full stop.

 

[seelah]

@corydm27 Kicking them out? No. They can stay as long as they want. Housing is beyond expensive. My kid is still on the fence about choosing college or going to a technical school. Even if they decide to move out and had to move back home, the door is always open.

 

[lgonz]

@corydm27 It is cruel to kick your child out simply because they are eighteen years old. Thirty year Olds with college degrees can't live alone without roommates because rent is so expensive; how on earth would you expect an eighteen year old, who may not even have graduated high school yet, to make their way in the world without support???

 

[charlieannem]

@corydm27 I wouldn't even think of kicking my kids out at 18. I've got kids that are 16, 17 and 19.

 

[yakob123]

@corydm27 My daughter is graduating this year. She is allowed to live at home as long as she needs to. If she is going to school I won't ask for any rent beyond what she is already contributing. She pays for her car insurance & gas as well as the groceries that she wants (her decision). If she didn't want to go to college then she would need to be working & contribute something in rent. We'd work out what a reasonable amount would be

 

[kalulabelle]

@corydm27 I could not see ever kicking my kid out as long as they were making a good faith effort to work/go to school/grow up. There would need to be some significant issues for me to consider it.

 

[chillman]

@corydm27 My kids are always welcome in my home. My 19yo daughter is attending college & lives at home. I only ask to know if I should not expect her home. She helps out with chores the same as she always has. My son moved out when he was 18, came back briefly & has left the nest again. He also helped with everyday chores & occasionally bought groceries for all of us. I love being with my kids, and every day I get with them is a bonus.

 

[fullofwonder78]

@corydm27 My lad is 18 now. I'd never kick him out. He's starting uni in September, staying local and staying at home

 

[mark419]

@corydm27 I told my kids they can live with me forever if they want. I would never kick them out. My mom shipped me out when I was barely 17. My youngest sibling was out by 16. I would never do that to my kids.

 

[anhphuong]

@corydm27 I have a 19 year old.

He graduated 6 months after turning 18. I'd never ever, ever consider kicking out a young adult finishing up school.
He decided he needed a break from school and didn't want to start college right away. We let him take the summer off and hang out with his friends. When fall came, he started job hunting and it took a while, he really felt like a failure, because he couldn't even figure out how to get hired at Walmart. This led to the real dilemma. To kick him out or not. We have a housing crisis in our area. Inflation is unreal. Even with a full time job, he wouldn't be able to find, then afford, a place to live. I couldn't, for the life of me, see a good reason to kick him out. We had to do something drastic, but kicking him out felt like we'd be setting him up for failure.
Anyhow, we made his life super uncomfortable. He was forced to work for his dad's construction company (he was paid for his labor) until he had enough and went and found his own job. He's been paying us rent since January, and has obtainable goals he's working towards.
So no. In this day and age, with housing and economic crises, I wouldn't kick out an 18 year old kid. And mine was kind of problematic in getting motivated.

 

[earthbear]

@corydm27 We've always told them they are welcome to continue living with us as long as they are either working full time or going to school. But we've also, to help prepare them for the real world, had them pay a small amount.

Oldest moved out at 20. Next one at 17 (sounds bad, but isn't...went to college at 17 a distance away, stayed on campus, then when graduated, moved into an apartment with a roommate. And now we're on our second set of teens...one is 17, the other almost 15.

 

[justme12345678910]

@corydm27 I moved out of 18 because of a terrible home life. I had to move my oldest son out when he was 19 just because he wasn't going to school or working I was just sitting playing video games all day. It hurt my heart so much but I think it was the right thing for him. My youngest is still a couple years away from that but I would like her to stay as long as she wants, as long as she is moving through life by getting a job or going to school.

 

[totellthetruth]

@corydm27 As long as I have a home my kid has a home. If they are doing things to make the home uncomfortable that needs to change. Them being there doesn’t count.

 

[tim_h]

@corydm27 My girls know they have a home with their dad and me, always.

 

[whybeblinded]

@corydm27 I moved out when I was 19 and moved in with my boyfriend because I hated my father. I ended up marrying that boyfriend and it ended up being a really big mistake that greatly affected my life. I don’t want my kids making the same mistake so they will always be welcome here as long as they are trying to make their lives better.

 

[glennheath]

@corydm27 My daughter just turned 18 in march. She doesn’t graduate until end of may, but we have no plans on kicking her out. We did have a talk about expectations while still in school and when she graduated will have another talk. As long as she is employed full time, or going to school full time she can stay home rent free as long as she isn’t causing a ruckus.

 

[sandgroper101]

@corydm27 I could not wait to move out and moved out a few weeks after high school graduation.

I don’t think this generation is the same. I fear my kids will stay at home until they get married.