laurenelizz
New member
Hi! I wanted to post to help others because this group really helped me power through sleep training.
First baby: a great sleeper (7-7 with a 10pm dream feed) until the four month sleep regression. That's when we decided to sleep train/cry it out. Because babies start developing the ability to recognize patterns at this age, they are able to start recognizing a bed time routine. Think of the regression as an opportunity, because it means your baby's brain is developing and they can now learn good sleep habits. Here's what we did: first, we started transitioning from all the rocking, shooshing, etc. to a new bedtime routine: book-song-put in crib awake. I switched gradually to this route for both naps and bedtime. By gradually, I mean: I added the book-song and cut out one sleep crutch at a time over several days (e.g. first stopped the pacifier, then stopped the rocking, then stopped the shooshing). People say naps are different, but I found it easier emotionally to start with daytimes: putting her down awake and letting her cry herself to sleep. I found it helpful to watch the clock and think "let's just see if she puts herself to sleep after 5 minutes of crying" and usually she did. At the end of that week of letting her cry herself to sleep and staying consistent with the bedtime route rather than any sleep crutches, we decided to put her to bed and not to go in until morning (other than the 10pm dream feed) even if she cried during the night. We had one night of crying, after which she started sleeping through until 7am. She is now 3.5 and has been an incredible sleeper ever since (except for the occasional sleep regression in the first year or so, when we'd need to CIO again for a night or two).
Second baby: unlike my first, he had NOT been sleeping through the night prior to the 4 month sleep regression, which hit last week and made everything everything worse. He is a big hungry boy and always woke up 1-3 times to feed at night. We'd tried previously to put him back to sleep with means other than the boob (e.g. pacifier) to see if we could drop the night feeds, but he'd just start waking up every 30 minutes until I fed him, so he was clearly hungry. This is why I wasn't sure if CIO would work yet (he is 4.5 months), since I thought he might really still need a middle of the night feed. But one thing I kept holding on to was the fact that he was never that hungry when he woke up for the day in the morning. That suggested to me that he didn't need both the middle of the night and the morning feeds - he would be fine with just one of those. And GOD I wanted it to be in the morning!!
Here's what we did: I started shifting to the new bedtime routine for about a week. Book-song-in the crib awake, no sleep crutches. He did well with this (sometimes crying for a bit but then putting himself to sleep). However, he was still waking up all hours of the night. Night one: we decided to let him cry it out through the night, but I set an alarm for 3am and fed him at that time when he was asleep, to make sure he was getting the calories, but not responding to crying with the boob. Night two: I decided to go cold turkey and not go in after the 10pm dream feed until the morning. It was HORRIBLE. He cried from 3-5:15am during which time I desperately scrolled this reddit feed and then ultimately gave up and fed him. But the next night was AMAZING! He slept until 6am. Since that night, he's cried a bit here and there in the night, but we do not go in and he always puts himself back to sleep and wakes up happy for the day at around 7am.
IT IS WORTH IT, BE STRONG, YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!
Remember, you are helping your baby learn to self soothe and go to sleep independently - are there any more important skills in life? And you are helping yourself, so that you can be a good parent and functional person. Last week I put the vegetables back in the silverware drawer instead of the fridge and I also fell down the stairs. I was worried I was going to get fired from my job and I could barely smile at my baby. Now I am getting my life back!
P.S. Use ear plugs!
First baby: a great sleeper (7-7 with a 10pm dream feed) until the four month sleep regression. That's when we decided to sleep train/cry it out. Because babies start developing the ability to recognize patterns at this age, they are able to start recognizing a bed time routine. Think of the regression as an opportunity, because it means your baby's brain is developing and they can now learn good sleep habits. Here's what we did: first, we started transitioning from all the rocking, shooshing, etc. to a new bedtime routine: book-song-put in crib awake. I switched gradually to this route for both naps and bedtime. By gradually, I mean: I added the book-song and cut out one sleep crutch at a time over several days (e.g. first stopped the pacifier, then stopped the rocking, then stopped the shooshing). People say naps are different, but I found it easier emotionally to start with daytimes: putting her down awake and letting her cry herself to sleep. I found it helpful to watch the clock and think "let's just see if she puts herself to sleep after 5 minutes of crying" and usually she did. At the end of that week of letting her cry herself to sleep and staying consistent with the bedtime route rather than any sleep crutches, we decided to put her to bed and not to go in until morning (other than the 10pm dream feed) even if she cried during the night. We had one night of crying, after which she started sleeping through until 7am. She is now 3.5 and has been an incredible sleeper ever since (except for the occasional sleep regression in the first year or so, when we'd need to CIO again for a night or two).
Second baby: unlike my first, he had NOT been sleeping through the night prior to the 4 month sleep regression, which hit last week and made everything everything worse. He is a big hungry boy and always woke up 1-3 times to feed at night. We'd tried previously to put him back to sleep with means other than the boob (e.g. pacifier) to see if we could drop the night feeds, but he'd just start waking up every 30 minutes until I fed him, so he was clearly hungry. This is why I wasn't sure if CIO would work yet (he is 4.5 months), since I thought he might really still need a middle of the night feed. But one thing I kept holding on to was the fact that he was never that hungry when he woke up for the day in the morning. That suggested to me that he didn't need both the middle of the night and the morning feeds - he would be fine with just one of those. And GOD I wanted it to be in the morning!!
Here's what we did: I started shifting to the new bedtime routine for about a week. Book-song-in the crib awake, no sleep crutches. He did well with this (sometimes crying for a bit but then putting himself to sleep). However, he was still waking up all hours of the night. Night one: we decided to let him cry it out through the night, but I set an alarm for 3am and fed him at that time when he was asleep, to make sure he was getting the calories, but not responding to crying with the boob. Night two: I decided to go cold turkey and not go in after the 10pm dream feed until the morning. It was HORRIBLE. He cried from 3-5:15am during which time I desperately scrolled this reddit feed and then ultimately gave up and fed him. But the next night was AMAZING! He slept until 6am. Since that night, he's cried a bit here and there in the night, but we do not go in and he always puts himself back to sleep and wakes up happy for the day at around 7am.
IT IS WORTH IT, BE STRONG, YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!
Remember, you are helping your baby learn to self soothe and go to sleep independently - are there any more important skills in life? And you are helping yourself, so that you can be a good parent and functional person. Last week I put the vegetables back in the silverware drawer instead of the fridge and I also fell down the stairs. I was worried I was going to get fired from my job and I could barely smile at my baby. Now I am getting my life back!
P.S. Use ear plugs!