Sterilization

@holypath As if having another child would ever fill the void and null the grievances of a lossed child. People who use that to make OAD people regret their choices/change their mind are grasping at straws.
 
@holypath Yes! I’m 28 with one kid and just had mine done. I have to say I was very lucky to have an awesome doctor who didn’t even question me. Just gave me the risks, percentage of women that regret it, and why they recommend the man gets a vasectomy. But didn’t push back at all. Not sure if it helps but I live in Colorado.
 
@holypath There is a list on the child free Reddit and circulating on the interwebs with like 1000 gynecologists that will sterilize anyone with thorough counseling.
 
@holypath I am 30sF and had a hystero last week. One child/one pregnancy. Dr was excellent. Didn’t fuss or make me justify it. Didn’t ask about my husband, didn’t mention regret. He just asked if I was sure I’m done, I said yes, and then he said great, now we can have a conversation. I think times have changed for many doctors under 50 (maybe 40?) and I think RvW also changes the calculus now for many practical people.
 
@amydcohen Sure. I was super nervous. I’ve never had any serious medical issue, broken bones, or surgery before… so 😬 but it’s been actually really great. Not to say it wasn’t a challenge but I only took one pain pill on the morning directly after surgery. Nothing since. It’s amazing how much pain there isn’t. I drove at 48 hrs. Been working off and on on my laptop (nothing crazy) but I don’t have any brain fog or issues from anesthesia. It did hurt when my bladder was full the first few days but as soon as I went to the bathroom the pain left. That’s gone now though. The only thing is one of the lap cuts hurts more than others but its not something I’m worried about. It doesn’t look infected or anything. The nurse said there is a bigger tool and it likely was in that incision for that one to hurt more. Overall, crazy easy considering I was totally under and had multiple organs removed. I am moving slower just bc my stomach is swollen and a bit sore. But I ordered taco John’s and Starbucks the day of the procedure on the way home and have been eating regularly the entire time. Would def recommend stool softeners just so you don’t have to do any straining or pushing with a sore tummy though. I’m only a week out so I don’t know how sex will be or the whole cuff thing, but so far, I’d do it again. I also kinda can’t wait to have a normal period without my body trying to kill me. I did keep my ovaries so I will still have a cycle. Did that answer anything for you?
 
@elministro50 Yes! Thank you so much for being thorough! Definitely the idea makes me nervous too. I just had my baby by emergency C-section 3 months ago. Let me say- recovery was ROUGH the first 3 weeks for me. I didn’t realize how hard it would be once I got home and was only left with ibuprofen for meds. I went home after 2 nights in the hospital. Long story short- it was horrible labor process. By the time I had the surgery, I was shaking so hard and vomiting during the whole procedure (a reaction to the meds). Honestly, I’m terrified of going through that again. My SO doesn’t want to get a vasectomy. But I’m willing to do this - I was just worried about recovery and pain. It sounds like it’s a lot better than the alternative (another C-section).

I’m glad you’re recovering well 🤘🏽
 
@holypath Man I’m 18 and need to get it done for some medical reasons and ik they’re not gonna let me I’m down in tx I’m terrified to even have sex atp
 
@holypath Yup, had my baby in July, got my tubes removed in April. Best decision I made!

My tip would be to search for /childfree's list of doctors who won't give you pushback.
 
@holypath I inquired about it last week at my annual and my doctor said “you’re young and healthy, are you trying to give your husband to leave you?” And basically insinuated that if I do it my husband will cheat or leave.
I think he got so dramatic because I stared with “my husband doesn’t a vasectomy so I want to inquire about getting my tubes removed”. Looking back I shouldn’t have said that but he also shouldn’t have said ANY of what came out of his mouth.
Needless to say but I’ll be getting a new doctor.
 
@holypath That’s really great y’all are on the same page.

My husband wants more kids and I just truthfully don’t. I’m fully satisfied and feel complete with one and he thinks we need a bigger family.
 
@holypath I was sterilized at 32 when my only was 2. I went to the GYN with a list of reasons why I needed one and she cut me off two sentences in and said that me saying that I wanted one was reason enough to perform one.
 
@holypath Had a planned c-section with tubal removal 4 weeks ago with my first child and I'm also 29. I explained that I never wanted to be pregnant again and my mental health was suffering. They tried to suggest an IUD but I can't even manage to get a pap smear my anxiety is so bad and I refuse to go back on birth control because when I came off I felt so much better.

They did suggest vasectomy for my husband but those can reverse on their own and I just wanted a sure fire way to know I would never be pregnant ever again. I actually wanted my uterus removed but he wouldn't do that because of the risks so tubes it was.

I honestly did not get a lot of push back with it. They asked a few times but the doc was really ok with it. I signed the paperwork when I was about 20 weeks pregnant then day of my c-section he just had to ask I was sure again and that was it.
 
@cindlee I’ve been asking to get my tubes tied since I was 18. Never wanted kids. Got married withy husband knowing I didn’t want them. He also wasn’t wanting kids. We hit a different part of life where we felt financially stable and we both agreed we’d give it a go if I got pregnant good and if I didn’t then no harm no foul. Boom 💥 I got pregnant quicccckkkk it was quite shocking to be honest. Had a great pregnancy, beautiful delivery and my daughter is the baby that makes you want to have more babies she’s so good. But it was SO ROUGH on my mental state. Postpartum, Rearranging my entire life, working and trying to be a good present parent, trying to overcome gender roles in my hispanic household, it’s too much. I CAN NOT do it all over again. I have NO DESIRE whatsoever and no one can guarantee it’ll be that “easy” again. I’m just now feeling like myself again.
 
@holypath I was the same!! Wanted then tied for years and then met my hubby. Now we have our son and I'm so blessed but I will never go through that again lol. And now we are in the newborn stage and some moments I don't why I did this but I know it will pass and I'm really looking forward to that future!
 
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