I thought you might appreciate this here as well.
Mom Groups Be Like:
Mom A: “My house is on fire and my child is inside screaming. What do I do?! Picture for attention!"
Mom B: “Try changing his diet. We cut out everything except kale and it’s done wonders for our kids.”
Mom C: “Essential oils. Unrelated: I sell them.”
Mom D: “He’s fine. Helicopter moms ugh. I didn’t even use a car seat when I was a kid and I’m fine!
”
Mom E: “He’s NOT FINE. My friend’s sister’s 2nd cousin had this happen and it was cancer. Google it!”
Mom F: “I’m a realtor and I’d love to help you find a new home!”
Mom G: “SAVE YOUR CHILD WHY ARE YOU ASKING STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET?!”
Mom H: “Rude [sup]^[/sup] Have you tried separating the child from the fire?
Mom I: "Squirt some breastmilk on your child. Breastmilk cures everything"
Mom J: "Since there's so many ppl commenting here, can you tell me if this preg test is positive?! I'm only 2 days post ovulation but my boobs are sore and I'm nauseous"
Mom K: "I think there’s more to the story that you aren’t telling us. Please tell us your story from when you were born till now so we can evaluate your life and show you where you went wrong”
Mom L: “has he had his fire vaccinations yet? That will herd immunity protect him from the flames.”
Mom M: “[sup][sup]I[/sup][/sup] wish death upon you![sup]^[/sup] How dare you believe in science and expose your child to heavy metals, autism, and ignorance by suggesting fire vaccinations!! Have you not seen Vaxxed?”
Mom N: just put some coconut oil on it!
Mom O: just latch him on demand to increase supply, lots of skin to skin.
Mom P: have you considered CIO? We tried it during the last fire and he only cried for 10 minutes. Hasn’t complained since.
Mom Q: I would NEVER let my child CIO. He is 16 years old and has never cried his whole life, not even for a minute. We still bed share and he nurses on demand 4-5 times a night.
Mom R: Did you have him evaluated for lip/tongue ties? I had my LO's revised last week and it has made a huge difference in his screaming.
Mom S: Is he formula fed? The formula companies don't want you to know that formula causes house fires. They work with the insurance companies, so it's really your fault that the house is on fire and he's screaming. I would NEVER feed that poison to my child.
Mom T: sometimes when you’re feeling overwhelmed just walk away. Come back when you’ve had a chance to breathe.
Mom U: Strip him down to just diaper. He's probably too warm! If his rectal temp is 100.4 he needs to go to the ER immediately!
Mom V: “Are you looking for a work from home option? Maybe if you were home with your child more you could’ve prevented the fire. Sending PM”
Mom W: Don't listen to any of this! Follow your mom gut! You're a great mom!
Mom X: let go and let God
Mom Y: don't stress. When he gets too hot, he'll come out on his own.
Mom Z: Girl use this alone time to get your hair done or go on a date night!
Mom Groups Be Like:
Mom A: “My house is on fire and my child is inside screaming. What do I do?! Picture for attention!"
Mom B: “Try changing his diet. We cut out everything except kale and it’s done wonders for our kids.”
Mom C: “Essential oils. Unrelated: I sell them.”
Mom D: “He’s fine. Helicopter moms ugh. I didn’t even use a car seat when I was a kid and I’m fine!
”Mom E: “He’s NOT FINE. My friend’s sister’s 2nd cousin had this happen and it was cancer. Google it!”
Mom F: “I’m a realtor and I’d love to help you find a new home!”
Mom G: “SAVE YOUR CHILD WHY ARE YOU ASKING STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET?!”
Mom H: “Rude [sup]^[/sup] Have you tried separating the child from the fire?
Mom I: "Squirt some breastmilk on your child. Breastmilk cures everything"
Mom J: "Since there's so many ppl commenting here, can you tell me if this preg test is positive?! I'm only 2 days post ovulation but my boobs are sore and I'm nauseous"
Mom K: "I think there’s more to the story that you aren’t telling us. Please tell us your story from when you were born till now so we can evaluate your life and show you where you went wrong”
Mom L: “has he had his fire vaccinations yet? That will herd immunity protect him from the flames.”
Mom M: “[sup][sup]I[/sup][/sup] wish death upon you![sup]^[/sup] How dare you believe in science and expose your child to heavy metals, autism, and ignorance by suggesting fire vaccinations!! Have you not seen Vaxxed?”
Mom N: just put some coconut oil on it!
Mom O: just latch him on demand to increase supply, lots of skin to skin.
Mom P: have you considered CIO? We tried it during the last fire and he only cried for 10 minutes. Hasn’t complained since.
Mom Q: I would NEVER let my child CIO. He is 16 years old and has never cried his whole life, not even for a minute. We still bed share and he nurses on demand 4-5 times a night.
Mom R: Did you have him evaluated for lip/tongue ties? I had my LO's revised last week and it has made a huge difference in his screaming.
Mom S: Is he formula fed? The formula companies don't want you to know that formula causes house fires. They work with the insurance companies, so it's really your fault that the house is on fire and he's screaming. I would NEVER feed that poison to my child.
Mom T: sometimes when you’re feeling overwhelmed just walk away. Come back when you’ve had a chance to breathe.
Mom U: Strip him down to just diaper. He's probably too warm! If his rectal temp is 100.4 he needs to go to the ER immediately!
Mom V: “Are you looking for a work from home option? Maybe if you were home with your child more you could’ve prevented the fire. Sending PM”
Mom W: Don't listen to any of this! Follow your mom gut! You're a great mom!
Mom X: let go and let God
Mom Y: don't stress. When he gets too hot, he'll come out on his own.
Mom Z: Girl use this alone time to get your hair done or go on a date night!