JUsT iGnOrE iT

[noelfaith]

Have a high needs kiddo who is as yet not fully diagnosed except as having high levels of anxiety and depression. We’ve fallen into a really destructive cycle of him being an absolute wildling unless I yell, then he cries, ten mins later the cycle begins again. The best advice I’ve gotten is to just “ignore” the destructive behavior.

How? How do I ignore shrieking at the top of his lungs? Ripping everything off tables and throwing it? Throwing food across the room? Like my brain hurts from him yelling, shouting, clapping, snapping, meowing, all. Damn. Day.

How do you just ignore this without losing your mind.

 

[d214]

@noelfaith I'm convinced that "just ignore it" is code for "your kid sounds complicated and irritating so I would like to just ignore this conversation now".

 

[riskyboots]

@noelfaith We need soundproof rubber rooms for our kids

 

[greensto]

@riskyboots We also need them for adults ! Think of it. Being able to scream without scaring our kids to death would be so helpful sometimes.

 

[riskyboots]

@greensto Oooooh yes

 

[lil_sisa]

@noelfaith

1. Get noise cancelling headphones.
2. Ignore shrieking or yelling. Ignore anything that doesn’t physically hurt persons or personal property.
3. Be patient while you wait for a diagnosis. That will come with therapies which will hopefully help.

Love and luck.

Source: I have 2 autistic kids, and all three of us have a good pair of noise cancelling headphones.

 

[greensto]

@noelfaith I don’t know if you want advice or just a good venting session.
I see you. That seems really hard.
I know all about the guilt of yelling at your struggling kid. I did it too. I changed my ways but I still fail sometimes and that’s okay. We can’t be perfect because we can’t set perfection as a goal for them. When I mess up I say sorry and we move on.