Is it weird that my ex and I say “love you” to each other?

[jacquelinelouise92]

Just emphasizing that I’m not shaming you. If he were to pull back from this dynamic because he found a relationship, that would tell you that he was using this as a placeholder for romantic connection.

 

[secondstoryempires]

@jacquelinelouise92 You know she’s purposely not answering you because she knows she would lose her mind if he set emotional boundaries with her.

Queue the ‘everything was perfect until she came along’

 

[dilios]

@skupi As I was typing to leave a comment, I had to delete it a couple times because I’m not sure. This is interesting.

 

[katrina2017]

@skupi Why don’t you guys attempt relationship counseling and try to “fix the boat”?

 

[skupi]

@katrina2017 Oh no I don’t feel that way about him. I’ve known him since I was 17, he may as well be my brother at this point lol

 

[skupi]

@katrina2017 And I’m in such a good relationship. I’m so happy and having the best time of my life. I wish that he could have that too

 

[jkcuster]

@skupi This is so relatable. Except for the i love you part I’m also starting to have that kind of relationship with my ex. Together since we were 20 but ended things almost 2 years ago. We spoke, agreed we should separate, said our goodbyes and wished each other the best. There was never bad feelings or anger or anything like that, we just knew we weren’t gonna make each other happy anymore but at the same time we have this beautiful daughter that deserves the world so we’re just happy to still be able to care for each other in a way. Ex has been in a relationship for awhile now and I like to see her happy, she deserves it. I’m sure she’d be happy for me as well. Anyways, all this to say I’m glad you can make it work and that you guys were also able to put your differences aside all for the love of the kids. 8 years is a loooong time. Gives me hope we can also make it work for as long as possible. Thank you for sharing.

To your question…umm. Love is a big word but it’s different for everyone. If that’s how you feel then that’s how you feel. Your ex knows what you mean because he probably feels the same. It’s not romantic but more of a “I really really care for you”. You know, he knows

 

[athiestsavedbygrace]

@skupi Every coparenting relationship is different but I personally wouldn’t tell my ex I loved her, would cross too many lines

 

[bb1212]

@skupi There is NOTHING wrong with your relationship. It’s beautiful and it’s special. Do not let anyone take away this great coparenting relationship. It impacts you and the kids. Be upfront with your partners about the family dynamics and find someone who fits into it all

 

[modestdeity]

@bb1212 are you… the ex husband…

 

[lilypeace12]

@skupi You’re technically emotionally cheating on your boyfriend with your ex. I know from a comment reply you made that you and your ex broke up because he lied about staying in work late but then riding dirt bikes which doesn’t seem that serious to break up the family dynamic. I think your personally demanding and if your ex had to lie just to do a hobby he liked well that doesn’t make him family ready that makes him a man who probably was sick of being told he could only do what he wanted on the weekends so instead he’s rather lie to enjoy his hobby instead of share it with you. Idk I think this relationship/friendship is going to hurt your new relationship with the boyfriend and in turn hurt the kids. How can you call the last relationship you ex had a mess and say now she’s gone you can get close to him again. That sounds like jealousy and that you will never be truly happy with whoever he ends up with unless it’s you… my opinion of course

 

[skupi]

@lilypeace12 I only brought up the dirt bike incident to show that he wasn’t taking family life very seriously and wasn’t home often bc he just wanted to do whatever he wanted while I stayed home with the kids. I didn’t have a social life anymore. There were other things going on too but I don’t really need to explain myself further

 

[lilypeace12]

@skupi Okay it’s no one’s business as to why y’all broke up but you’re going to end up hurting your new relationship especially if you haven’t discussed this all to you new boyfriend….

 

[skupi]

@lilypeace12 My bf doesn’t care I’m friends with my ex, he knows we have always had a good coparenting relationship. My bf is not the jealous type and he knows I am basically obsessed with him lol

 

[lilypeace12]

@skupi So why did you come here asking for an answer about if it’s wrong or right? Deep down you know it’s not right and you’re feeling guilty about some extra feelings or you honestly don’t want any answers and just peoples opinions for no good reason

 

[skupi]

@lilypeace12 You can say it’s wrong, I’m not disagreeing with that either way. It’s given me something to think about but I do disagree that I’m emotionally cheating, bc it’s not like that at all

 

[lilypeace12]

@skupi Okay not emotionally cheating but there’s definitely a boundary your crossing which is going to end up either hurting you, the kids, your new partner or your exes new relationship if he ever gets a chance to have one

 

[skupi]

@lilypeace12 I hope he does get that chance, he needs something good in his life like that. I’ll be more mindful of sharing my care for him in the future so that there isn’t any opportunity for things to be misconstrued

 

[lilypeace12]

@skupi Of course I do believe he might get confused at some point and it could lead to hurt feelings! On the contrary I do believe it’s a healthy co-parenting relationship for the kids sake but in further just set up a boundary especially when and if he gets a girlfriend just so everyone is on the same page! Goodluck