@eline I say this with kindness, but when I pushed back to my medical team, in THE SLIGHTEST, they sent my girls home. Like you, I wanted to get a better feel for potential time lines for my girls, so during rounds I asked about the metrics they were using to gauge their health and readiness to go home. This was something I thought would be a simple request and that the info would be readily available. Personally my work almost revolves around this type of situation, but I'm not going to post it here as it would be extremely triggering. But in those files it's standard to see goals for baby's. For example 24 hrs w/o brady event, able to fully regulate body temperature etc.
Anyway it went from them needing to stay until atleast their due date (4 weeks in the future) to them not even staying a full week. The doctor came back to me after rounds, slapped a big black binder and a tablet on the counter and told me to watch a CPR video on the tablet. I told her I was already adult and pediatric CPR certified, she had me sign a form and told the nurses to get the babies ready for discharge that same day.
That was horrifying, because then I felt like I was bringing unstable babies home that were going to die in the sleep or something. I didn't sleep much for months, and started hallucinating. I would only sleep when they were awake under my husband's care, because I needed to watch them sleep. I was just so scared.
So, even though it's rough, consider how you'd feel bringing your baby home if there was still a reasonable risk of something happening. It might cause you more anxiety and grief that a slightly longer stay.