@k3at I take all computers, gaming and phone away and put them in my bedroom at 10pm every night. Even weekends. It has helped my son a lot. And just sending tons of love and support. This is so hard. You’re doing everything you can, and that’s more than a lot of parents…
@k3at I would talk to Doctor about a temp sleep aid to reset her clock, implement a routine, screens turned in at X time.
And if you feel she needs meds for anxiety still, I would suggest together talking to her psychiatrist about trying a different med. Maybe Zoloft wasn’t the right fit & she’d be more compliant if it had a better outcome for her.
@k3at If she doesn't want to, nothing will help. Sleep hygiene is more important than medication. Have you asked why WHY she doesn't think it'll help or what would happen if she tries? Does she know the consequences?
I struggle with sleep too and I'm diagnosed with ADHD, BPD and Anxiety. I'm on three different medications. What I learned is: I have to try again and again. Medication alone doesn't help. If I take medication that help without changing my sleep hygiene, it's medication that force me to sleep. But that means that I'm very tired the whole day too. Even if I slept 13 hours.
She has to try. She needs to get to bed at the same time every day. I listen to audio books until I fall asleep. Because waiting in bed for hours is frustrating. But I lay in bed and listen to a audio book I like. If it takes me a couple hours to sleep, that's fine. If your daughter isn't ready to work on her sleep schedule, you can't do anything. You can't force her. She's not a small child anymore. Help her so she realizes which long and short term consequences exist. After that you can't do anything unless you want to hospitalize her.
@k3at Just one lady’s opinion here, but…She doesn’t want to sleep. I don’t think it’s that she can’t, it’s that there aren’t consequences for not sleeping. You let her go in late, have all her possessions, get bad grades. Sleep is a biological function. She sleeps. She just is clearly finding it more enjoyable to stay up and do… what? Doomscroll on her phone? Watch Netflix? Chat with some weirdo overseas on discord? Do the work and find out what she’s doing or remove the possibility of her doing anything fun. This should be your first course of action.
@pastorpontibus I appreciate you taking out the time to post but she’s been diagnosed with a sleep disorder as a result of severe anxiety and PTSD. It’s not a matter of “doesn’t want to sleep”.
@k3at May have to do inpatient treatment if she is refusing to follow the doctors orders as far as medication and continued counseling. Pandemic has been extremely hard on teens unfortunately. Maybe set data cap on all devices and turn off wifi at 10pm you'll have to change the wifi password and add parental feature to cell phone for data cap.
@k3at Turn off her internet at whatever time you agree on. Phone and laptop in your room. TV remote in your room. She only has access to books between X and X. I would try that for a few weeks. She must be exhausted and if she’s bored, she will hopefully sleep.
@k3at Also no caffeine after a certain time, for me it is 2 pm as it stays in my system keeping me awake later. That’s many sodas, chocolate, teas, coffee and more.
Virtual hugs to you and stay strong and healthy yourself!
@k3at I would reconsider the meds for anxiety and OCD. Anxiety is absolutely a sleep killer even when you have a great sleep routine and willingness to do what is necessary. Lexapro has done wonders for my teen with anxiety and has not caused any insomnia. Definitely talk to a psychiatrist - there are many effective treatments for anxiety that you haven't tried yet.
I also agree with turning off the internet and all electronics at 10pm. Staying up late should not be an opportunity to do anything more entertaining or stimulating than reading a book.
ETA: Sometimes when you are anxious you get in the habit of being awake at night that's hard to break. When I had my first baby I couldn't fall asleep at night because I kept expecting the baby to wake up and start crying. I trained myself to sleep again by taking a half of a Unisom sleep tab every time I went to bed for a week. It would knock me out enough so that I would sleep six hours before the baby woke me. And after a week, I was used to sleeping again and tapered off the drug.
