Help me please, before I lose my ever loving mind. Read full post!

@konradpankoff Lol no, my 3 yr old wakes to see me and I offer the toilet then straight to bed. She has an iron bladder (and doesn’t drink enough) and can easily hold it til morning. I think it’s just dumb luck. Everything I’ve read says it’s hormonal, but her bladder is better than mine lol
 
@amayasasaki Is she still napping? If she's taking a nap, bedtime may need to be much later because she's not tired. If she isn't napping, take her outside and run her around a bunch befoe bedtime. Extra activity always helps my kids get tired enough for bed.
 
@amayasasaki I would give "one last...." of everything, then put them in bed, and then just leave it to chance. "You need to potty? Well, you just had one last potty, so you have to hold it till morning now".

At this age, sleep training involves the sleep lady shuffle/chair method, or the 100 walks. The key with both of those though, is there is a plan for you leaving the room. If you aren't there, there is no audience for her performance.
 
@amayasasaki Stop sitting by her - it’s overstimulating. Also, it’s normal to stall bedtime. Just say no and close the door. She’s old enough to play in her room before she gets tired enough to go to sleep.
 
@amayasasaki You need to stop giving into her requests.

Give her whatever she normally uses as an excuse before bed. We give our wee one a choice to have some cereal before bed and a drink of milk or water. Then we get her to use the potty when she brushes her teeth.

We’ve set a strict routine of two books and two songs and we will sit with her for 10 minutes after free routine is done.
 
@amayasasaki What time does she get up? It could be a scheduling issue or simply she’s testing boundaries. My almost 3 year old has tried to do this for bedtime. We simply do the same routine each night and don’t allow it to deviate at all unless there are new (suddenly scared of monsters) or extenuating circumstances (ill). We always have one care take do the entire routine (so no giving in to “I want the other parent”), pee breaks at the start, middle, and right before getting in bed, we end it with her choosing her night light color, sing, and leave. She sometimes protests after we leave but always settles!
 
@amayasasaki We use a gate in the doorway so he feels like he has access to us. He can ask for one (and only one) more hug and a drink if he runs out. Other than that, we only go to the gate if he hurts himself or he poops. If we have to go to the gate, we reinforce that it’s bedtime and he needs to lay down. He usually plays with some toys in the dark, then eventually goes to bed. It took awhile to get there, but it works. (We had to stop sitting with him or sleeping with him because it was cutting into mom and dad time.)
 
@amayasasaki We give my almost 3 year old some books to read in bed and it has been a game changer.

We do bedtime routine, tuck him in and give him a pile of books next to his bed that he gets to choose from. Sometimes he sits for a while, up to an hour, but he’s in there by himself and eventually passes out. I don’t know if this would help you, but it has worked well for us so I thought I’d share!
 
@amayasasaki I got in a bad habit when the grandparents were visiting around the holidays where she wanted me to stay until she fell asleep and I did it because I wasn't getting as much time with her during the day. Then Pappy passed away late January so I haven't pushed to break the habit. I think it's working in my favor though because I tell her I'm only staying until she falls asleep and if she's not going to close her eyes and try to sleep, then I'm not going to stay. We average about 10-15 minutes between lights out and when she's actually asleep. There is the occasional hour+ night, but usually only if she took a nap that day.
 
@amayasasaki U need to be prepared for all that ahead of time. My daughter does the same. Have water ready, like a literal water bottle of her own, that she keeps by her bed. Ask her at the beginning of bedtime routine, do u want mommy or daddy to put you to sleep tonight? Then tell her, mommy and daddy will NOT, be switching once she has made a choice. You HAVE to stick to that. Once she starts asking for daddy and mommy has already started the bed routine, you say " no mommy is putting you to sleep tonight, tomorrow night daddy will have his turn" (or however u choose to word it) We always have to be a step ahead of them lol my kid has done the same things.
 
@amayasasaki It also takes us almost an hour every night for my daughter to fall asleep. She will be 4 in October. It’s just her sleep temperament. When I reflect I’m very much the exact same way no matter how tired I am. Just here to complain in solitude. It’s extremely frustrating and as long as she doesn’t cry then I feel like winning during that time. 😅
 
@amayasasaki My big kids are 12 & 13, and they both went through this when they were between 2 and 5. I don't know if we ever had a particular strategy that worked; we just toughed it out. And we read this book to ourselves because there comes a time when you can either laugh or cry. Our current baby is 14 months and is gearing up for refusing to go to bed. We'll brush off our copy of the book soon.
 

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