Giving up hope + preparing to be single forever

[imaginaryfiction]

40f w/ two kids (14,7). Divorced/separated 6 years. Followed by a 3 year relationship that ended about 15 months ago with an emotionally abusive man who was 15 years older. It was a toxic relationship and I’ve been spending the last year trying to figure how not to make the same mistakes and identity all of my missteps. I’m working on me and trying to grow into the person I’d like to be. The first year was empowering but the several months something has changed. I’m feeling more alone and less hopeful that there is a partner out there for me that I can build a life with. I feel like I missed my chance and the older I get the less time I have to find a great man to love and be loved by. I feel sad and lonely and discouraged. I’m an extrovert and a super social person so I can pretend to be doing fine single really well but it’s getting harder. I’ve always been an optimist but I can feel that part of me fading. I don’t want to lose hope but it’s hard. How are you dealing with it? If you’re over 35 do you think it becomes less likely each year you’re meet someone meaningful?

 

[redemption645]

@imaginaryfiction Hugs to you. I'm 42 and in a very similar boat. Divorced 6 years, broke up with some last summer and have just been working on myself, and trying to learn what I can from past relationships. But also lonely sometimes and it can feel like this is it, no more significant partners. But I don't actually believe this is true. Each of my parents met their now-partners in their 50s, and I've seen others pair up late in life, too. Keep the faith!!

 

[imaginaryfiction]

@redemption645 Thank you for responding. Love hearing your parents found love later in life. I’m only seeing people who are already partnered up and feeling like I’m running out of tune to have a great long love. I’m trying not to give up. I think I’m in a funk and feeling more overwhelmed at the moment.

 

[redemption645]

@imaginaryfiction I understand being in a funk and feeling overwhelmed. I hope it gets better soon.