Are sleepovers at Grandparents normal for children 1 - 2 years old

[jezreel37]

@anonymousbl The sooner you start the better they'll deal with them

 

[carolj471]

@jackstack Yeah, I see no issue with this whatsoever. To be honest, whether it's common or not shouldn't really factor into either of your decisions. If you're both happy with it, then all good, if not, then it's a conversation.

 

[perfect786]

@carolj471 This should be the top comment - what's normal isn't always what's right for your family.

 

[josephjurg]

@carolj471 Yup. My nephews have been doing overnights with my mom since a month old. My kid did his first over night closer to 2.5. It just depends on your own comfortableness wirh the situation.

 

[willowbean]

@jackstack My kids have a night a week at their grandparents. Started from when they were one. It's great for us as we get a break and fantastic for the grandchild/grandparent relationship

 

[ivw4300]

@willowbean I have to say I'm so incredibly jealous.

We live 2 hours from the closest family so we rarely get this opportunity and it's a beating.

 

[chollom]

@ivw4300 I'll join the jealousy train. My mother's a 10 minute drive away and she's too anxious to look after my boy on her own. She does come round to our house and "help" once a week in the daytime though which is something.

 

[bnewcomer148]

@chollom Choo choo on the jealousy train. My in laws live 20 minutes away, they are both just 60 and fit for their age and they haven’t once had my 5 and a half year old overnight, never mind my almost 3 year old. Not even once just babysitting for the evening so we can have a date night. The most we get is 2-3 hours in the middle of the day on a Sunday occasionally, maybe once every 6 weeks.

 

[skywatcher365]

@bnewcomer148 Another car has been added to this train...

My parents say they would love to watch them... but we have to bring the kids to them. An hour away, in the bush, at the cottage. So cool, for my wife and i to be able to go to dinner on a date night? 4 hours of driving. Thanks, mom and dad. Big help.

Frustrating, as both of their set of parents helped them with my siblings and i as kids, a lot. They go to go out regularly, and we had lots of time with grandparents. But now that it's their turn...

At least my wife's parents make the effort. They make the 2.5 hour drive every 6-8 weeks, and usually are OK with letting us sneak out for some us time-whether that's a date night, or just to run some errands together.

 

[katrina2017]

@skywatcher365 We do this every month. My MIL lives 2 hours away from our place, we drive to her place on Friday, drop our kids off and together my SO and I go to a nice restaurant, after it we have a hotel room and spend the night there, have a lovely breakfast at the hotel, have some walk in the woods, or do some activity and then we pick up our kids up again.

Maybe this is an option for you to suggest?

 

[skywatcher365]

@katrina2017 Her parents would be up for it, but my parents wouldn't be. But her parents arent the problem.

My parents insist on an 8am pickup the next morning, because they are so "busy". When you ask them what they are busy with, the response is "just stuff around the house". They are retired and have all the time in the world for house chores. Closest restaurant or hotel from them is an hour away, so itd be like a 6am wake-up in the morning, at best.

My parents will literally hear the plan, make up a number of inconvenient requirements, and then when you reply with "nevermind", act as if they did all they could to accommodate, and it's us that's the problem.

Appreciate the thought, though.

 

[bleeper123]

@jackstack Nah, this is fine. She raised your wife. If she is okay with that level of baby sitting let her.

 

[rme09]

@bleeper123 Unless she knows that her mother isn't suitable to watch or raise a kid.

 

[bleeper123]

@rme09 That may be the case, but that's a different conversation.

 

[svavaosk]

@jackstack My sons loved staying over at my mother in law from around that age. Not several times per month but maybe every 3 months. My MIL would have liked to keep them 24/7 lol. She loved those boys.

 

[bouncingaussiebunny]

@jackstack If the grandmother is happy with it and you're confident she could handle any early waking or nighttime issues, I don't see why your son can't spend the night there.

Having said that, three times a month is quite a lot of sleepovers. This is doubly true if your mother-in-law is already having him during the day four times a week. It's a significant committment in terms of both time and energy, so you may want to check if your wife is hesitant because she's worried your son would struggle with being away, or whether her mum would struggle with the extra childcare.

Or, I suppose, a combination of both.

For what it's worth, I know my folks would love to have my son stay in theory, but they would be either cranky or exhausted by the end of week two. However, my wife's cousin used to have her sons stay with their grandma every Friday night and it seemed to work well for them.

 

[ajr250]

@jackstack Curious...if grandparent is so close, why not have her babysit at your home while you two go out?

 

[followthestar]

@jackstack We started once the kids slept through the night. So for some ours were more like 2. For our youngest it hasn’t happened yet (he’s 3). But that was more my condition about sleeping through as their bedroom was a good distance from where the kids would sleep and I’m not sure how keen they were on bed sharing.

 

[courtneyatzn]

@followthestar Your kid is 2 as isn’t sleeping through the night?! How are you alive!?

 

[followthestar]

@courtneyatzn That’s actually really normal. It just gets easier to manage. So 2 of my kids have always still woken during the night until about 2/3. It’s now just no longer a 30 minute resettle but instead a “sure babe come into bed with us.” Or “quick cuddle and then I’m back to bed ok.”.