2yo + 6 week old + wife with a tumor in her leg

[redpanda]

Fuck fuck fuckity fuck.
We have a boisterous two and a half year old and we had a baby a month and a half ago and this week we found out that my wife doesn't have A sprain or ongoing pain from other pregnancy problems.She has a tumor in her leg.
Thankfully, it's supposedly benign.We'll find out soon.We're doing all we can through for getting her treatment.But Jesus h f****** Christ.This is the most difficult thing i've ever go on through.
We've got a specialist on board and we'll be seeing them very soon.
After the surgery, she's likely to have a full leaguAfter the surgery, she's likely to have a full league cast for UP to 6 weeks. Who No, maybe longer.
I suppose all I'm here for is to hear some other dad saying.Holy shit that is awful awful awful and awful.

Yes I am Seeing a counselor about this and we have a good support network

 

[bethelxhillsong]

@redpanda Man I’m so sorry to hear
That is tough just reading that let alone what it would be like living that.

It sounds like you’re doing the right things to look after yourself.

All I can really say is just remember that this is a phase of your life, a dam challenging, shitty phase but this is not your forever, you must and you will get through this!

Come here to post and let it out any time throughout this journey, we’re hear to listen.

Best of luck with it fellow dad and wishing your wife all the best in her journey.

 

[redpanda]

@bethelxhillsong Thank you fellow dad

 

[davidjones247]

@redpanda Really sorry to hear what you and your family are going through, but glad it seems to be benign. Don't be afraid to lean on that support network you mentioned, and remember to take care of yourself while you're taking care of everyone else.

 

[christophvver12]

@redpanda Hang in there and you'll both be through the other side in 6 months. You done it with the first one. Just be there as much as you can for them and then come on here and scream and shout. You've all got this.

 

[redpanda]

@christophvver12 Thank you fellow dad

 

[randomguy123]

@redpanda Holy shit that is awful awful awful awful.

My son just turned 2.5 and his mom threw her back out this weekend, and I was already feeling the pain of taking care of her and him.

Adding a 6 week old to that. I can't imagine.

FWIW, just know that there's a dad in Virginia who is gonna use your shit situation to keep his in perspective.

 

[ericab]

@redpanda Hey man, I gotta tell you... that really blows.

I mean... fuuuuuuuck. That sucks.

Sounds like it will all be good in 2-3 months, but in the meantime, ouch.

You mind if I have a beer and shake my head slowly about how awful that is?

 

[redpanda]

@ericab Please do

 

[orthodoxguy]

@redpanda Don't let the thoughts get to you mate. Benign tumors happen to people all the time. It's pretty difficult to not fall down the rabbit hole though. You have this internet strangers sympathy. Good luck to you and your family!

 

[raonleyong1]

@redpanda I tore my ACL and was non-weight-bearing/crutches for 6 weeks with a 6 month old. 0/10 do not recommend. It was a major pain and hassle. Doing it with two kids would be a whole 'nother level of awful.

Ask your doc about delaying surgery for 6 or 8 months. It might be a terrible idea, or it might be fine. Letting the younger kid hit the 6 months / sleep training window, and getting out of that initial newborn hell is a decision to consider. It gets so much easier later on.

If you can afford it, get a meal subscription plan. Call in every favor from your friends, family, and neighbors.

Figure out how to use your parental leave (if you get one) to maximum effect. Good luck.

 

[redpanda]

@raonleyong1 Not possible to delay. Thankfully newborn is an absolute angel. It's much tougher on and with the toddler

 

[anne_l]

@redpanda My wife got diagnosed with a tumor in her knee when the little one was around 6months. Giant cell tumor. It’s very rare but almost impossible to remove completely. Dm me if you have any questions… not sure what type of tumor she has but it took about 6-7months for recovery. It was harder on the wife than me.

 

[redpanda]

@anne_l DMed

 

[rrcoffin]

@redpanda I’ve got an almost 4 year old. An 8 month old. And my wife just developed some back problems this week. And we’re moving. I feel you man.

Although comparison is the thief of joy, I sometimes have to realize how good I have it, I think about people raising families in difficult circumstances in 3rd world countries etc.

We are blessed and have to change our perspective if we are to have peace each day.

Praying for you dad bro