TTC and had first fertility appointment. What a shit show

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pollinnna230

New member
Hi everyone, been a lurker for a while since I started TTC and I’ve been inspired by all your stories.

I finally got a call from a local fertility clinic to start my process. I’m 5’9” at 290lbs so that’s a BMI of about 43. The doctor basically said no treatments would work and I need to lose weight. With PCOS and hypothyroidism, weight loss has been my goal forever and with obviously little success unless I restrict to an insane level. I’m highly discouraged because I eat healthy 99% of the time and exercise 3 times a week at the gym (with regular activity the other days but not a strenuous workout).

I feel I’m doing everything I can to live a healthy lifestyle and all my bloodwork, insulin and sugar is within normal ranges thanks in part to the meds I take (Synthroid ans metformin).

I feel this insane pressure to be on ozempic because this doctor asked if I had ever considered it. I don’t know why lately it’s been pushed so much more. My endo who has followed me since I was diagnosed with PCOS as a teenager never thought I needed and is reluctant to push drugs just for fun. Meanwhile I don’t want to waste months waiting for weight loss since I’m going to be 35 this year and the magical cutoff for conception is looming.

I guess I would like some reassurance from anyone who’s been in a similar situation and has had a healthy pregnancy.

I feel like as a plus size woman, it’s just discrimination and an assumption that pregnancy is just so out of the realm of possibility.

The most insane thing I heard on this call is that if your cycle is over 35 days, you’re not ovulating…. So if I have a 36 day cycle, I didn’t ovulate? These doctors supposedly have all the answers and they say shit like this?!? My cycles vary between 33 and 38 days… does that mean I ovulate occasionally? I take my temps and every single cycle I’ve done this confirmed an ovulation along with OPKs…
I feel so discouraged right now with the whole fertility healthcare system.
 
@pollinnna230 Respectfully, you need to find another reproductive endocrinologist/fertility specialist.

I am the same height as you and was 7 pounds heavier when I got pregnant. I was also 40 and doing IVF. I told my reproductive endocrinologist that I was concerned about having a healthy pregnancy and baby at the weight I was. Her exact words were “ I’ve worked in the Midwest my entire career… You have nowhere near the highest BMI I’ve ever seen.” my A1c was 5.1, my blood pressure was normal, my blood sugar was good, and my thyroid function was great. She explained that the risks were slightly higher because of my weight and my age but that 35 is an arbitrary number that the medical community came up with regarding increasing risk. A 27-year-old can have issues just like a 42-year-old can have a perfectly uneventful pregnancy, and healthy baby… Don’t get hung up on 35 years of age.

Another thing not to get hung up on is the “increased risk.” When people talk about the risk of XYZ “doubling” due to obesity, it is things like going from 2% to 4%.

I did end up with gestational diabetes, but that has to do with the placenta not your weight. I had a healthy 8 pound baby girl at one day shy of 38 weeks. My OB never once mentioned my weight or weight gain with pregnancy. Fat phobia exists in the medical community, and you just have to find a Doctor who isn’t looking at only a number on the scale.
 
@contemplatio Thank you so much for your comment. I swear, your story made me tear up. I knew as the call was going in that this was insane fatphobia and automatically putting me in a box of bad health when I take better care of myself than many thinner people i know.
I wish it was easier to get a different doctor at this clinic. My usual endo is much better and doesn’t make me feel like shit. This supposed specialist was so hung up on the number on the scale and I am so shocked that it’s that arbitrary.
 
@pollinnna230 We have a similar starting BMI. PCOS and hypothyroidism as well. My fertility doctor had no problem starting treatment with me. We got pregnant our first IUI, and now I’m holding my first baby. Had a perfectly healthy pregnancy, no complications and a healthy delivery.
 
@pollinnna230 I'm sorry you've had this experience. As others have said, you should definitely look for a new doc if you can.

I wanted to add that you're right that the #1 thing that affects egg quality is age. Of course you still have lots of time, but waiting for weight loss isn't the move. In fact, the Canadian Fertility and Andrology Society specifically says not to put off reproduction assistance for weight loss (see Obesity and Reproduction, July 2018). It also notes that weight loss doesn't really work - even bariatric surgeries don't have great long term compliance.
 
@kevinkret86 Thank you soooo much for sharing this. This is exactly what was just recommended to me and I find that absolutely insane: to put off trying to lose weight. I felt in my heart it wasn’t the right move and science once again backs my feelings exactly! Thank you thank you thank you!!
 
@kevinkret86 I know someone who had bariatric surgery in order to lose weight before getting pregnant. From photos, 5 years later she seems to be almost back up to her previous weight
 
@pollinnna230 Hi! I was 31 with PCOS and hypothyroidism, weighing in at 258 lbs at 5'3".

My husband and I tried to conceive for 6 years, and I was told the same things you were. I didn't want to try serious medical procedures in order to get pregnant, so I focused on bettering and tracking ovulation. I was on merformin and levothyroxine forever, and it never did anything for me ovulation-wise. However, once I switched to Synthroid (name brand) and added inositol to the mix, I got pregnant rather quickly. I was doing a powder version of inositol (Ovasitol) twice a day and am currently 33 weeks pregnant. I was diagnosed with GD at 10 weeks pregnant, so I have had to deal with insulin and diet throughout my pregnancy. But overall, it has been a pretty easy pregnancy. I'm actually down to 240 lbs currently. Baby is in the 50 percentile for weight, so literally average and very healthy.

I'd advise getting another doctor who will not focus so much on your weight, but on getting your PCOS and hypothyroidism in check.
 
@requiredname Hi and thank you for sharing! My thyroid and sugar are in check and I’m also on Synthroid and metformin. I recently got ovasitol so maybe that will be the thing that works! I’m definitely dumping this doctor asap.
Wishing you a continued healthy pregnancy!!
 
@pollinnna230 I also have PCOS and Hypo ! That sounds like you are heading in the right direction! What really did the trick for me after getting on Synthroid, Inositol and Metformin was doing a one month hormone reset with birth control then taking Letrozole to induce ovulation and having sex every other day from day 10-20 ! I’m currently 24 weeks pregnant with a healthy baby boy!
 
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