Teenage son things random small talk is pointless between parent and kid

[metsuko]

EDIT: **Teenage son thinks random small talk is pointless between parent and kid.**

The only thing he likes talking to me about is where am I going to have breakfast/lunch/dinner.I like to have small random talks about trivial things when we are driving.E.G. Today. "Why are you smiling and staring at me today dad?" Me. "I'm just happy and admiring how you had a growth spurt and getting so tall." Him, "That is weird. Silly response."

3 minutes later. "BTW, I have some general advice for you today. Today, I had to jump start your car. If you ever get in that situation, just remember red wire is positive and black is negative. If you have two colors, the dominant one is usually positive. E.G. Brown+ and White." His reply, "Dad, why not just replace the battery. What a waste of time to know this. And why do I even need to know this. "Me, "You need to be prepared for a jump if your car ever dies in a parking lot. Let me quickly show when we get home as I need to trickle charge it." Him. "Nah, I got better things to do."

Kid is just a wise guy and driving me insane. Just a dad trying to have some small talk with his son. This whole teenage thing is making me feel so old. It is like we have nothing in common to talk about.

 

[jaharrttttt]

@metsuko I know it's cliche to say but it WILL get better. I swear they only real solution to the problem of awful teens is time. I know every situation is different but I've witnessed it myself many times. One day you will be friends again but for now you are THE WORST. Try not to let it hurt your feelings too bad. I know it's not easy.

 

[mcross]

@jaharrttttt OP this guy is spot on! It is normal. It’s terrible and hurtful and crazy-making but qtip-quit taking it personal. This is the only way! It you get angry, it just makes it worse.
Keep talking. Keep being yourself. He’ll come around

 

[sparrowfeet]

@jaharrttttt I always thought I’d never be the worst— and yet here I am. Slightly better now that he has been at college a semester. The eclipse may be passing!

 

[hein]

@metsuko Just here to agree that it's very typical. At least he responds to you! My son just tells me he doesn't want to talk. Someone once told me that your kids going through puberty is like watching an eclipse, so don't worry. The sun is going out for a bit, but it will come back, just you wait.

 

[sparrowfeet]

@metsuko No small talk until 23 - -possibly 25.

I used to talk to my son about EVERYTHING. He is 19 and it has been like you describe for a while. .. so much going on in their teenage brains; they are barely hanging in there.

 

[metsuko]

@sparrowfeet This is what I think too.

 

[bengalinath19]

@metsuko My son does the same

 

[bronald]

@metsuko My son and I talk about interests we both share. He wants to talk about food, sounds like! Start with that and maybe it will beer into other topics! Best of luck.

 

[tmark938]

@metsuko So I came here to tell you that I’m glad I’m not the only one with a son that says the same thing. He does not do small talk at all with me. It’s all about what to eat, what he NEEDS, something that happened at school, or a reference to a show he likes. If I start conversations he’s not interested in talking at all.

I pointed out a view during a college tour yesterday and he nit picked what I said. I said “ wow you get a really good view of the town from here it really is walkable. A lot closer than I imagined.” He says “they said that in the presentation. That’s annoying mom” It’s constant with him. Policing everything I say.

 

[metsuko]

Thanks all. Yeah, I am just going to have to endure it. I love my kids regardless of the phases they go through. Good to hear I am not alone.

 

[joshuaaa]

@metsuko Sounds pretty typical.

And he has a point, gas-powered cars are going to stop being manufactured in the next 10 years. Jumping a car will be as common as a rotary phone before too long.

 

[julien]

@metsuko Cats in the cradle and the silver spoon.

 

[ajhnh]

@metsuko I’m 46 and my mum still talks trivial stuff to me - but now I find it kinda cute