Sitting here with my newborn sleeping on my chest and I can’t imagine doing this while having another child too

[moodymoose77]

@afterhours Thank you for this. My husband was formula fed after 6 weeks and he turned out just fine lol that’s what I tell myself when I feel overwhelmed and inadequate.

 

[88delivered]

@daughteroftheking89 Had a planned c-section on Tuesday morning due to GD and I’m sitting here with my daughter on my chest too! Recovery is really painful so far and we are already combo feeding. I came to one and done a searched c-section because as I sit here I’m so in love with her, but I can’t imagine doing it twice. I needed to know I wasn’t alone.

I’m going to cherish this time with her because it will be once in a lifetime for me! Congrats and it’s nice to know there is someone out there going through the ringer with me.

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@88delivered Congrats on your little one! I hope you have a smooth recovery but yes it’s painful and absolutely not something to be taken lightly. I was combo feeding from the start but now I’m soley doing formula bc breastfeeding turned out way too stressful and pumping was so time consuming.

 

[88delivered]

@daughteroftheking89 Yep I’m going to give the pump a try when we get home but I’m not going to drive myself crazy over it either. I was EFF and my brother was EBF - we have the same immune system and smarts so I’m not sold on one being better then the other, what’s best for family is best!

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@88delivered I was formula fed from 2 weeks on and I don’t want to brag but I was a straight A honors student my whole school career and throughout university, so I’m very pro formula and fed is best

 

[88delivered]

@daughteroftheking89 Heck yeah! Software developer here! can I ask how did you handle your milk coming in? How did you get it to dry up? Was it painful? I’ll admit I don’t know much about how to handle it if I decide not to pump or it doesn’t work out.

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@88delivered My milk came in on day 3 and I pumped like 4 times a day (no schedule just whenever I had the chance) for 2 weeks but I barely produced any (might be bc I have PCOS). I had maybe 1.5/2oz in total from a whole day so I’d give my LO a bottle of that. A few days ago I just stopped pumping cold turkey bc I got mad at how much time it took to get so little out and I’ve been wearing a tight bra for a couple of days now with some tissues inside to soak up any leaking. It was a little bit painful at times but nothing bad at all, maybe bc I had such a low supply. I think it’s almost dried up now

 

[88delivered]

@daughteroftheking89 Thank you!

 

[122r]

@daughteroftheking89 Are you me?! I didn't have a c-section, but I had an epidural (that failed!) and basically ended up giving birth completely natural (unplanned) while all of the medicine was pooling in my right leg. So I basically gave birth with a bum leg.

DD would NOT latch and lost 10% of her birth weight. We had to put her on formula and went through several different ones until we ended up using Nutramigen. In the interim she would scream non stop all day long. It was terrible! Between that and extreme sleep deprevation I was a mess. We were scared to death to let her sleep anywhere other than a bed, which she wouldn't do. We ended up holding her for 99% of sleep until she was around 8 weeks old.

I remember being in the hospital riding that "baby high" when the doctor asked me if we were planning on using birth control and we said "No, we want to try again when she turns a year old" and now I laugh and laugh at how misguided I was. I had no idea! After that mess I knew I couldn't go through this again. No thank you!

I will say DD is a little over 5 months now and is honestly the cutest, smartest, sweetest baby and she sleeps 100% in her crib and only wakes up once a night for food. It gets so so much better. I can only offer you some hope and solidarity, sister.

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@122r I’m so sorry about the epidural, that sounds like a nightmare honestly. And same with my baby, he had a hard time latching and by day 2 in the hospital he was screaming starving so that’s when we just did formula and whatever I pumped at home we’d give him too.
I definitely want to get on birth control ASAP to make sure a repeat of this doesn’t happen even though I love my baby so much.

 

[kyrani]

@daughteroftheking89 Sorry to hear about your traumatic experience, it is so hard to process this when you have your baby literally needing you as life support. Take it day by day, week by week, it gets easier, it gets different. I have an 18 month old and those “bad” nights are so few and far between now - and it has gone crazy fast to get to this point. I think we always get the one and done feels after a shitty night through pure exhaustion and so easy for the brain to validate that. Hang in there.

 

[jameslaurich]

@kyrani In those long, long, torturous newborn days, I remember I couldn't even fathom having a 4 month old. That seemed so far away, completely unattainable. Then it's like I blinked and now I have an 8 month old. I just read your comment and thought "Wow, I can't imagine having an 18 month old. That seems so far away." What a trip, this parenting thing.

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@kyrani I completely agree with this!

 

[johnpaul37]

@daughteroftheking89 I was you, and my sweet girl is nearly 6. OAD and absolutely no regrets!

 

[genuinedad1968]

@daughteroftheking89 Yes I am completely with you! My partner longs for a newborn again, he’d have another in a heart beat and always says he wants the newborn baby phase all over again.
So do I but it’s never going to be like that ever again? I had months of total bliss at the start, dreamy lazy days snuggling my baby in peace. Is that really how it’s going to go when my sons a toddler and I’m holding a new born? Lol NO

 

[daughteroftheking89]

@genuinedad1968 I wish I loved the newborn phase but it’s been kicking my ass and I had a breakdown last night from sleep deprivation. The only good part is obviously how cute the baby is but other than that it’s pure survival

 

[katrina2017]

@daughteroftheking89 Been there with a similar postpartum experience and now have a three year old. Can confirm from the other side that imaging a newborn in the mix of our hectic days would be SO. FREAKIN. HARD. I can't imagine recovering from a c-section knowing I had to care for my older daughter as well.

 

[katrina2017]

@daughteroftheking89 I just want to say it's really nice to hear about the experiences of other moms who had unplanned traumatic c-sections. Not everyone can relate to what the experience was like (and even among us, our experiences all varied), but.. it's just nice to have your own experience and trauma validated. Thanks

 

[vika]

@daughteroftheking89 I think that about the toddler stage I’m in now. How would I enjoy taking him to park if I also had to be constantly breastfeeding a baby?? (And same argument for many other tasks)

 

[christseekingstudent]

@daughteroftheking89 I felt this way too from birth until about three months. Now at 5.5 months I am a fence sitter since I saw how fast the newborn phase went and how much easier it got. However, I realize there are more trials ahead!