robotclock
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She can’t sleep before 11 pm. She says she’s not tired. How could I handle this? She wakes up at 7:30 - in time for school. She says she’s not tired. Any suggestions?
My 8 y.o. is a night owl. Now what?
- Thread starter robotclock
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@robotclock Another question to ask is what she's doing during the day. Is she being challenged physically and mentally?
robotclock
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@robotclock My 8yo is also a night owl, and I sympathize; I was a night owl growing up, and I definitely didn't have too much screen time as we had one TV and my dad hogged it. I would always describe it as the best time for my imagination, as I was completely alone.
So with that in mind, we've settled on the agreement that she may stay up (we have no defined time, but if it's getting to be 11, I'll make her turn her light off at least). She has to stay in her room, and has no access to screens. We make sure she has crayons, pencils, paper, coloring books, and a journal her and I write to each-other in. It's worked really well for us for awhile, and it's so much better than fighting with her every single night.
So with that in mind, we've settled on the agreement that she may stay up (we have no defined time, but if it's getting to be 11, I'll make her turn her light off at least). She has to stay in her room, and has no access to screens. We make sure she has crayons, pencils, paper, coloring books, and a journal her and I write to each-other in. It's worked really well for us for awhile, and it's so much better than fighting with her every single night.
robotclock
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@robotclock What is she doing between 7:30pm and 11pm? I bet a million bucks that it’s screen time
robotclock
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@robotclock I've read that a good rule of thumb is no screens/blue light emitting devices for minimum 1 hr before bedtime, to give the brain time to wind down and recognize that it's time to feel sleepy now.
Personally, our rule of thumb (for 1st grader) is no screens on schoolnights at all. We save 'em for the weekend. We're not avoidant of showing him an occasional cute YouTube video we came across, or looking something up on the web with our phones to answer his questions...we just don't allow movies/TV/video games on weeknights. There's barely time for it anyway, between daycare ending at dinnertime, having dinner, cleaning up dinner dishes/mess, talking about how his day went, packing backpack and laying out clothes for the next day, shower when necessary, reading time before bed....and of course all the stalling that happens in between each activity.
That pretty much eats up the 2 hrs we have before his bedtime. 
Personally, our rule of thumb (for 1st grader) is no screens on schoolnights at all. We save 'em for the weekend. We're not avoidant of showing him an occasional cute YouTube video we came across, or looking something up on the web with our phones to answer his questions...we just don't allow movies/TV/video games on weeknights. There's barely time for it anyway, between daycare ending at dinnertime, having dinner, cleaning up dinner dishes/mess, talking about how his day went, packing backpack and laying out clothes for the next day, shower when necessary, reading time before bed....and of course all the stalling that happens in between each activity.
That pretty much eats up the 2 hrs we have before his bedtime. robotclock
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@robotclock My son (almost 7) was staying up until 9:30-10 regularly. Also saying he wasn’t tired. We started a new bedtime routine that worked pretty well. Screen time ends by 8 at the latest. Then he gets 15-20 mins to play in his room. Then one of us reads him a story. Then he has to rest in bed with the lights out for 10-15 minutes, listening to an audiobook. If he didn’t fall asleep, he knew he was allowed to get up and play for 10 mins again, then try resting again. Ever since the first two nights, he’s fallen asleep during this rest period!
Edit: we used a night light with a timer so he’d know how long his rest period was. When the night light turned off, if he was still awake and not tired, he could get out of bed.
Edit: we used a night light with a timer so he’d know how long his rest period was. When the night light turned off, if he was still awake and not tired, he could get out of bed.
ruprechtrogers
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@rafiek Tried this for two days with my almost 7 yo and its kinda amazing. What it does is that it takes away the bad vibes, its not that he just have to lie there and be bored while we're getting increasingly annoyed that he wont stop playing. Instead he knows he can get up and do stuff if he isn't asleep after a while.
Second night he fell asleep a bit earlier, I think I'm beginning to see a separation of the bed as a place to play and more be for sleeping.
Second night he fell asleep a bit earlier, I think I'm beginning to see a separation of the bed as a place to play and more be for sleeping.
robotclock
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@robotclock I hope it helps!
spearhead45
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@robotclock Is she active outside or in sports? Or is she an indoor kid? Is she eating and drinking healthy or junk?
hisagishuuhei
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@robotclock One of my best friends used to stay up till 2am+ reading books. She was always the smartest in the class. She also had a huge family so parents couldn't control every aspect of their lives.
@robotclock She is probably going to need more sleep than that, especially on a regular basis. Sleep is just so important for health and wellbeing! I don't know the recommended hrs of sleep for an 8yo, but there is a range of what's ok you should be able to look up.
Screen time before bed can have a negative effect on sleep because the blue light can disturb your brains circadian rhythm, basically making your brain think it's still daytime. That could be the reason she says she isn't tired.
No screen time one hour before bed time is the recommendation. No more than 2 hours a day in all is what's recommend, but it depends on your situation. Screens can also be a way to learn, and a lifeline for kids during covid.
I think generally as a parent you should trust yourself and help your kid understand that sometimes we have to do things, even though we don't want to, like go to bed when it's time. I'm 35 and I still want to 'stay up late' so it's hard for adults too!
Good luck to you.
Screen time before bed can have a negative effect on sleep because the blue light can disturb your brains circadian rhythm, basically making your brain think it's still daytime. That could be the reason she says she isn't tired.
No screen time one hour before bed time is the recommendation. No more than 2 hours a day in all is what's recommend, but it depends on your situation. Screens can also be a way to learn, and a lifeline for kids during covid.
I think generally as a parent you should trust yourself and help your kid understand that sometimes we have to do things, even though we don't want to, like go to bed when it's time. I'm 35 and I still want to 'stay up late' so it's hard for adults too!
Good luck to you.