Multilingual for a shy child?

[holgate86]

My 4 year old knows 4 languages, 3 fluently. One of the three (Language A) is the language spoken at preschool and by his peers. However, he's generally a shy child and hesitant to communicate with his teachers and classmates. So despite understanding Language A very well and possessing a wide vocabulary, his ability to speak A is very limited.

Of the other two languages he knows well, I'm the main person he interacts with in B. I'm also the ONLY source of interaction in his 4th language D, and there are no other speakers where we live or even in our family.

My dilemma: I primarily speak to my son in B and D. Should I speak to him more in A? The preschool encourages it as they want to boost his communication skills.

Question: did any of you switch to the school/community language at home in order to help a child boost their social skills? What was the outcome?

 

[mamckay41]

@holgate86 So my kid also has 4 languages and didn't want to speak the school language until 4.5 years where he suddenly opened up. I think it just takes time

 

[barsomo]

@mamckay41 Same thing happened to my daughter around 5, also 4 languages. Good to hear she’s not the only one!

 

[mamckay41]

@barsomo Yeah and now he is unstoppable . Like talking to neighbourghs casually when before he couldn't even say hi

 

[barsomo]

@mamckay41 That’s awesome

 

[exsdonchance]

@holgate86 My son also speaks 4 languages. We noticed that he will take 10-15 minutes to warm up and assess which language he will use. He does not initiate play with other kids or conversation with adults.

 

[barsomo]

@exsdonchance How old is your son? My daughter definitely takes some time to warm up as well, she also speaks 4

 

[exsdonchance]

@barsomo He is 4

 

[barsomo]

@exsdonchance My daughter was also mega shy at 4, I was a bit worried. But now at 5y a totally different story!

 

[barsomo]

@holgate86 My 5-year-old daughter also speaks 4 languages and she has been SO shy with the community language (which we don’t speak to her or never speak at home) although she has gone to daycare where they speak that language almost exclusively since she was 1.

She just started school that’s fully in the community language and she has suddenly come out of her shell completely. I can see her going to talk to kids she doesn’t know in the community language, going to ballet class alone and talking to the teacher in the community language, all things that I wouldn’t have been possible a year ago… so I think there is something that happens developmentally around 5 years. Just give it time. I would say stick to your language if you are the only source and maybe try to find friends, activities or hobbies for your kid in language A.

Btw, me and my husband have a podcast about our journey of raising our daughters multilingual, as you are a fellow parent dealing with 4 languages maybe you can relate to some of our challenges: https://spotify.link/Tbb9BeLQ3Cb