I wOn'T dO tHaT wHeN I HaVe KiDs

enoch27

New member
Yes. Yes I DO that. I will lay down with my toddlers for an hour to make sure they go to sleep because I can't stand hearing my babies ask for mama because they want me to lay with them. Yes. Yes I DO make different dinners sometimes because I'm not wanting to deal with a meltdown. Yes. Yes I DO put on a movie because I need five seconds to myself. Yes. Yes I DO leave dishes in the sink, don't pick up any toys, or keep on top of laundry. I now understand why there was always a chuckle when I stated what my rules would be parenting.
 
@henry78 Same but it’s not even “bad” behavior that got me, it’s mostly just how much they need me.

I like my kids. I like being there for them. I don’t even know how to accurately explain it, other than: I hesitate to mix colors to paint with, even when they’re all fast asleep or even out of the house, because there’s a sense that I will be needed and the colors will dry out. I have a wet palette and other storage options but the feeling is there.
 
@enoch27 My sister (who never wanted to be pregnant or have children), would loudly tell me what a shitty parent I was every time I went over to my parents house with my daughter when she was a toddler.

"You shouldn't bribe her with lollies or x or y or z. A star chart is just more bribery"
And on and on and on.

It took 2 hours with my daughter on a good day before my sister resorted to "bribery".

I just think of the Penguins in The Madagascar movies "smile and wave boys, smile and wave..."
 
@ardor I think that’s what you don’t realize before kids. That after kids… so much is about SURVIVAL! And that means everything from surviving the day with your sanity intact to actually doing what you need to do to keep yourself functioning (I’m never going to let my kids sleep with me… breastfeed for longer than xx… formula feed at all… let them have a pacifier… “LET” them throw a fit in public 😂😂😂😂 etc)

And then some is you just love your kids so damn much you’d do all the things to make them happy. Not every moment is about discipline and keeping your kids in line. Sometimes the joy from having a small treat every day is so fantastic that why the heck wouldn’t you? (I’m never going to let my kids have candy.. let my kids have dessert every night.. Climb the furniture…etc)

And then some is just giving your kids all the things you never had just because you can (I’m never going to buy my kid whatever they want… get them a toy every time we go into a store… let them wear costumes nonstop in public… etc)

I knew well enough to skip make these big statements very often as i saw behind the parenting curtain early on and MOSTLY knew better but I definitely had some pre kid thoughts about screens that are completely out the window and I couldn’t care less LOL

I definitely give a sensible chuckle when my kid free friends make these claims or give me or my kiddos side eye when the shit is hitting the fan 🤪

You live and you learn!
 
@mrassassin777 Me over here absolutely CRACKING UP at the "no pacifier past 6 months" crowd!!!! My youngest kept hers until she was 4. I just wanted her to go to sleep, and sticking that easily available piece of child approved plastic in her face made her sleep!
 
@rachelred827 6 months?! Studies show that they prevent SIDS. My kid is 16 months and has one in every night. Now he's a binky bandit and somehow snuck one into daycare this morning. I don't care.
 
@sunnydaize I honestly don't know what age the experts recommend you get rid of them. My youngest is 12 now so it's been a while since I did "baby things". I just remember how many bullshit comments I got from people back when she still had it at 3. Esp. my MIL (who did some very strange things with her own kids) and my best friend(who had no kids at the time!!)

After a year of the comments I quit letting her have it in public, but I'd let her have it to go to sleep. I've never admitted (before my comment here) to anyone how old she was when she finally gave it up. Sometime into her second year of preschool she finally gave it up on her own.
 
@rachelred827 3 is not that old. The only reason I take it out during the day is to encourage him to talk. He still gets it in the car too. And if he's throwing a fit, I pop it in. My MIL calls it his "plug." 😂

Sometimes you just have to let kids dictate the timeline of when they are ready to let stuff go. I swore that I wouldn't breastfeed my child past 6 months. Queue to 16 months. He just gave it up himself. I was only doing it at night, because I was over it, but he figured out that I was doing it to get him to sleep. And how DARE I try to get him to sleep!!!

PS how great is it that all of us can admit all our mom things here? Best sub ever.
 
@frank3 My oldest daughter never liked the binky. She would not sleep either- like ever!! She's 18 now and still doesn't sleep well. I'm sorry, hope it gets better soon.
 
@enoch27 A mom just posted in a FB group I follow: "There's no need for kids to have Tylenol! I've been a mom for three years and have never needed it!"

Uhm. Ok? Good for you? Good for your kids not getting upset when teething? Good star for her 🥲
 
Back
Top