I have a bed time

[hayesruc]

i’m a freshman in highschool and my mom still gives me a bed time? It’s super embarrassing due to the fact all my friends parents don’t give them one? My bed time is 8:30/9 and i have a younger brother which is 8 and he has the same time? Is it just me or is this wrong?

 

[mimijo]

@hayesruc It's a little early for my taste, but kids your age need a TON of sleep. If it's embarrassing, so is going without sleep just because.

Maybe your parents might be more receptive to an incremental approach. Have you tried asking for 10? You could pitch it as balancing sleep health and some more autonomy as you get older.

 

[hayesruc]

@mimijo yea for sure it’s just so weird and unfair but i need to talk with them about it.

 

[nebulamoon]

@hayesruc Yeah, it should probably be more like 10:30-11:00, but tell your friends it’s a curfew.

 

[hayesruc]

@nebulamoon thanks for the help

 

[heatherthehumble]

@hayesruc Bedtime in general is not weird. The weird in this case is the time that it is. I assume there is some leeway with your bedtime which is good. I recommend regularly send yourself to bed at 8 30 show responsibility and likely get later bedtime as time goes on

 

[penguin87]

@hayesruc I had a "loose bedtime " meaning that if I wasn't doing homework or chores that absolutely needed to get done for some reason, I could stay up past my bedtime.

 

[hayesruc]

@penguin87 yeah that would be fair.

 

[katrina2017]

@hayesruc I had bed times for my kids until highschool, then I let them self regulate. I told them if they were having trouble getting up for school or grades were slipping, I would put a bed time back in place, I never had to.

Your parents are right that you still need a lot of sleep, and I'm sure part of it is that they get alone time before they want to go to bed, but imo that should be weighed against using highschool as a trial run at adulthood while you still have them as a safety net.

Present it as one of the small ways for you to prepare for adulthood, by self regulating sleep. Don't say it's embarrassing or all the other kids . . . Those are baby arguments, you want to present an adult argument.

 

[hayesruc]

@katrina2017 yeah i see where your coming from i need a stronger argument for sure.

 

[katrina2017]

@hayesruc If you want an adult freedom, ask for it in an adult way. I had a kid do a PowerPoint presentation complete with research on why it was a good idea. I couldn't say no to that.

 

[hayesruc]

@katrina2017 true i will talk to them in a orderly way.

 

[visavis88]

@hayesruc I think 9-9:30 is more reasonable, but still a bit strenuous..use the extra time for meditation and self care if you can sneak awake!

 

[hayesruc]

@visavis88 yeah but bedtime on weekends is really weird? is it not?

 

[visavis88]

@hayesruc Yes. Our 8 year old is allowed until midnight on weekends as long as nothing is planned.

 

[hayesruc]

@visavis88 yeah really weird i’ll have to talk to them about it.

 

[oliveshootsmummy]

@hayesruc i had a bedtime until 10th grade and it was 11:00 pm. that’s super early ngl….

 

[hayesruc]

@oliveshootsmummy fr that’s what i’ve said.

 

[ositez]

@hayesruc Lol I often wasn't finished with my homework at that age until midnight. It's not like I was even hanging out with friends--I was just that busy.

 

[hayesruc]

@ositez yeah for sure