As we’re home today w the kids for the holiday…

[rogger]

I just felt the need to vent about housing. As the kids grow our small house feels smaller and smaller. The thing that is particularly rough is the noise factor. Smaller house means less space to spread out and everyone can hear everyone. My kids are so loud. I’m constantly asking everyone to quiet down but it’s not really their fault. But I’m starting to realize how much this is affecting me and how it contributes to my sensory overload. I saw an Instagram post that said “a short story about me as a mom: I heard too many noises at once and now I’m a bitch” and I felt so validated.

We bought this house a decade ago after 2 years of failed attempts in a HCOL area. We were so battered by the process and once we finally found a small but decent house we bought it. I so regret it now. Of course no one could’ve known what would happen w the housing market and the interest rates. 4br houses (that need work) are now going for 1.2mil in my town. 10 years ago they were 700k. And that’s if you can even get the house. There are bidding wars for every single listing.

TLDR: small house = angry mom and also our housing market is broken

 

[savemarriage101]

@rogger I hear you on this. I think open concept houses and a lack of carpeting in living spaces make it a lot worse too. It becomes a huge, hard box and the sound just becomes overwhelming. It’s great for light, but not much else.

 

[yesjesus]

@savemarriage101 When we first bought our house, all we could afford was an older one that is not open concept. Once we had kids, I became so thankful for having separate areas especially now that they are getting older

 

[abzin44]

@yesjesus Same. Love my 1950s house. I “hide” in the kitchen all the time. I’m close enough to the living room to hear the kids if the need me, but it’s got enough separation that I feel like I’m alone.

 

[reporter94]

@yesjesus Yes! We don’t have an open concept because our house was built on 1984. I love that I can’t see in my kitchen from my living room, and the dining room is nowhere a tv can be seen. I love it.

 

[clemmy]

@reporter94 AMEN. I think people confuse “flow” with “open concept”. Our old house has amazing flow but also distinct rooms. If whoever is watching the kid in the living room tries to talk to the person making dinner or doing the dishes in the kitchen, it devolves into a volley of “what?” “I said…!” “WHAT!?” “Never mind! I’ll tell you later!”

You can hear yourself think again just by going into another room and - as you said - you can’t see the TV from the dining room.

 

[annaad0617]

@clemmy I love this! We also have “flow”.

The whole house was built by a carpenter in the 1980s and while it’s not particularly updated, it’s so thoughtfully and carefully designed that I’m constantly thrilled to live here.

It’s simultaneously homey, cozy, airy, and light.

 

[reporter94]

@annaad0617 Yes! So much this! My husband’s grandparents designed our house. There is no dead space- every single hallway has cupboards, there are 45 cupboard and drawer faces in our kitchen (that work- not just for show) and two built in cutting boards. I have 87 square feet of counter space (I know this because we just had our counters done). Is it everyone’s dream house? Nope. Not at all. But man does it have storage for days and a great flow that makes entertaining and daily living so lovely. I would never go back to open concept again after living in this house.

 

[nathaniel]

@clemmy Love that! We have flow - I'm gonna use that. No doors to separate room on the main floor but they are distinct and separate. The basement has a door and I'm grateful.

 

[abraham7777]

@savemarriage101 Our house is from 1910 and people keep telling us to knock out walls and make it open concept but I hate open concept. I grew up in a house like that and it was just never quiet. We're a one-child family but between toys and kid shows, it's loud enough.

 

[chihuahuagirl]

@abraham7777 Yes, same. My 1920 Sears house has rooms. The kitchen is pretty closed off from the rest of the house and it is staying that way lol.

 

[sheamus]

@savemarriage101 This is my house. It's a lofted bedroom and no basement. Hardly any doors. I have taken conference calls from the pantry or bathroom because WFH with kids during the pandemic was a whole experience.

 

[amyf]

@savemarriage101 YES. We bought our small 1974 ranch house 11 years ago pre-kids and knocked out walls to make it open concept. The entry way, living room, dining room, and kitchen are all one open space with dark hardwood floors. I despise it now with kids (ages 5 and 7) and the noise and visual stimulation level is off-the-charts. After feeling so defeated with the housing market and the price of family homes (plus the interest rates), we are leaning towards working with an architect to create a second living space for the kids and possibly adding a second story. I it will be cheaper than buying a new $1 million house with a 7% interest rate. Don't make the same mistakes I did!!! lol

 

[rogger]

@amyf I’m in a 1950s ranch house. Thankfully there’s a wall separating the kitchen and living space but it’s just so small that it doesn’t help all that much. I wish I didn’t buy into the starter home concept bc I would’ve waited it out for the bigger house. One floor was also great when they were babies but now it’s just so much…togetherness.

 

[amyf]

@rogger SO MUCH togetherness. Don't even get me started on when we have company. There is no place to go or separate!

 

[sybaelle]

@rogger i feel your pain! i have 3 kids in like 850 sq feet. VHCOL area. i also have migraines so the noise is ALOT. 2nding the earplugs to take the edge off.

 

[johnfisher]

@sybaelle Same! Tiny 3 bedroom for a family of 5, sleep training the baby has been near impossible. We are lucky to even have found this place as 3 bedrooms in our area are going for $2million+. It’s insane.

 

[kimberlystambaugh]

@johnfisher We have the bigger kid(s) have a sleepover in our bedroom at the other end of the house during sleep training.

 

[j2019]

@rogger We’re 700 sq ft. When we are all home we are always outside! This way, if someone needs a rest or a few minutes alone they just go inside and have the house to themselves! We have a fire pit, a propane heater, a deck, an outdoor projector, and a ton of yard games! We go for walks a few times a day as well. We started treating the outside as another living space and it made our house feel so much bigger.

 

[amyf]

@j2019 I love this.