adamnom

New member
I’m honestly going back n forth on the decision I love my daughter so much I love the time we spend just me and her all day I’ve always wanted 2 but now that I have one and she’s 17m the more time passes the more I don’t want to mess up the way our life’s have been it’s really so nice to have one kid with a good support system as well I’m afraid once #2 comes everything will change and I won’t like it I honestly want to know no sugar coats no bs straight up do you regret going from 1 to 2?
 
@adamnom I am pregnant with #2 and romanticized one and done for a long time. Your first is still young so there is time to decide. My first is 2.5 and that’s when we felt ready and decided on number 2 because we genuinely wanted another one. Will it change the life of our first, of course it will, but we hope in the best way possible.
 
@adamnom I had my second daughter 3 months ago and have absolutely no regrets. Life is busier and a little more chaotic, but I love it. My oldest (2.5) is so sweet with her little sister. In some ways having my second was easier because I’ve already done it before. I also have a great support system which definitely helps. I know it can be a hard decision and I hope you’re happy whatever you decide 😊
 
@adamnom My brother and his wife had a second when their first was 2.5. the first still isn't the biggest fan of their sibling and they genuinely wish they had stopped at one. Their lives have become infinitely harder and it has been three years since their second was born. So it isn't always "we have no regrets" it's just socially less acceptable to say you wish you hadn't had another kid.

Which one will be true for you, well, that's something only time would tell. We'll never know what the road we didn't take would have looked like.

There can be an insane amount of joy with another kid but it's likely that your current dynamic will change drastically. I personally am a fan of one and done but still somewhat on the fence. We would go for a larger age gap in any way, so number one is already a lot more self sufficient and not as reliant on us for everything, has more friends to play with etc.
 
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