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@mastercharles ooh that’s good to know re: the structured activities. when do they become developmentally appropriate?

@scooper8 omg i didn’t realize 6:1 was bad?? ALL of the daycares we looked into are 6:1 here, and we were looking at the nice ones lol

@stepheno i agree w everyone else that the weight percentile doesn’t sound alarming.. but in case it’s helpful to have another data point: our 6mo drinks 4 7-8 oz bottles, all in the daytime (occasionally if he wakes up in the night we’ll do a small snack feed). he also has 2 small solids...

@liuy ooh this sounds great, and takes care of some of the daycare cons (like transit time i mentioned). can i ask when you started this? was the nanny FT when your kids were infants?

@emmanuelkagie 15 min is not terrible! just not great for us. we don’t commute so it’s 15 min there & back 2x per day, plus transition time. AND i would be the only one to do pickups/dropoffs. so that’s 1.5 hours of my time that could be spent working.

@christianbikerg oh yes we looked at little gym (her suggestion actually) and plan to enroll him when cold/flu season winds down! i mean structured activities like i imagine they do in daycare? learning colors/shapes, circle time?? or you know anything that resembles an actual learning...

@reebern bc of the time spent picking up/dropping off/getting ready? bc of daycare illnesses? bc of being the only person responsible for these things (bc i assume your partner, like mine, is always at the hospital lol)?

hi! i see this question posed here a lot with diff circumstances.. so was hoping to get some advice from people in similar circumstances. i’m in a senior managerial role in consulting, a demanding but somewhat flexible job and i WFH. my husb is in a surgical residency and works 6a-6p ish M-F...

@haaaamoud yep this is how i feel we spent the first year also and it’s exhausting and has made an already difficult transition even more difficult :/ like who even benefitted from this??? and at what cost??

@yoshs i’ll have to try this suggestion! make it a “real” vacation but invite the ILs. when we have visited my FIL, we’ve stayed at their house in NYC but in the burbs.. so weve just milled abt their house. boring and also kind of weird for me bc FIL remarried and has high-school aged kids (my...

@might i just signed us up to have 2 meals delivered next week and i am SO EXCITED

@fejesusor i think this will be my mantra when it does feel like work and i’m wishing i didn’t have to do it or i had a hand and start hating my husband for not being that hand.. that maybe in this moment it sucks but it will be over so soon and i will miss it. :’)

@victoriablackwell ooh your trips w family seem nice! i’d love a cruise to alaska even if it meant having to hang out w my ILs

@fejesusor totally hear what you’re saying! and sometimes it is fun and fulfilling.. but sometimes it’s hard like if LO is being fussy/going thru some stuff, waking in the night and not settling easily.. it’s tough to have to manage that alone. i say that out loud knowing rationally that that’s...

@stephendoxey love this suggestion! making solo parent care.. less solo. :) will do this next time he has weekend call.. thankfully only one weekend a month now.

my husb is a resident and gets 3 1-week vacations per year. this past year, after the birth of our son (now 9 mo) we spent these vacations as follows: (1) visiting (& staying w) his parents in NYC (2) split bw visiting his grandma in SF and my parents in LA (3) visiting his grandpa in phoenix...

@phytoscience1 we will likely get an au pair when we have the space! my husbands dad and stepmom are both surgeons and they had au pairs when their kids were younger (they’re teenagers now).

@limeleaf i know this is going to be totally dependent on your home and your own tolerance for mess, but out of curiosity - how often do you have the housekeeper come? we do biweekly now (started abt 6 months into residency), but now w the baby and his being mobile/on the floor a lot i was...

@reebern i know the whole situation is temporary — LO will get older/slightly easier and there’s 1.5 more years of residency.. but i know the anger/resentment is hurting our (still kind of new-ish) marriage :( my sister is in big law so im familiar! what did you do to manage your (crazy)...

@ligerheart25 yes! some saturdays i do woodworking for a few hours while husband stays home and watches LO. i do feel a bit “filled” after that but.. something abt it feels unbalanced still. like yes maybe our personal time hours are roughly fair/equal but for him, my personal time means him...