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@riverwest What do you mean there isn't any violence? Is violence only broken and bloodied bodies to you? Your collusion with men is admirable but they don't need you to defend or deny their violence. Read OP again. And look at it through a framework of denial that you are promoting with your...

@riverwest No there isn't stigma for LEOs. They create an impenetrable shield around themselves to perpetrate OIDV and then take their families down. Lundy Bancroft writes about mental illness and how it's absolutely not a causative factor. People continue to reinforce this false idea of the...

@aramar No to couples counselling with LEOs. Not ever. They're professionally trained manipulators and he's already abusing power and broken trust. Contraindications for couples therapy right there

@elenchikos No. Not in policing. Police families are full of this bUrNoUt nonsense. He knows exactly what he's doing and you're falling for the broken hero myth. Google 40%

@elenchikos Yes read the books buy do NOT enter couples counselling now that he's abusing power and broken trust. Gilmartin will send you down a line of problem solving you do not need to bother with. This is a him problem. He fractured and he needs to repair. Departments offer all of the...

@claire19 Their father is choosing the need family. That's revolting but not uncommon. I'm so sorry your children are living this. Pull in all of your supports. Their dad could absolutely maintain a meaningful relationship with his children away from the risk but watch for that to unfold. Do not...

@pkhaney Afternoons are awesome. Why can't he take he to school in the morning? . But don't ignore your instincts and seek your own counselling away from his. You need to get your ducks in a row. If he needs a break from work your return to work could save your family. If he needs a break from...

@claire19 Do not protect the father's feelings. He is choosing this and has chosen repeatedly. Not integrating families with careful intent and pursuing priorities which negate the value and safety of children is far too normalised. This is entirely his mess to clean up but he's abandoning care. .

@bettyperson Wasband refused to acknowledge any schedule except his own. He's still a controlling jackarse but not in my home.

@procakes223 Their dad is drowning out any protective actions by mum as will anyone actively by standing on this. Misogyny is a real obstruction due to gendered weaponised incompetence which is what this is.

@claire19 Therapists re a disaster when these situations are unfolding. Always they amplify and reward violence. You've ticked every box and done all the right things per advice. Keep one foot in front of the other. It's not easy or simple ❤