Would u take a 7-10d holiday without your 2yo?

[perrero]

I have to go to Central America for a work conference (poor me, lol). Its to the no.1 country I've always wanted to visit since we studied it at school. Me and my partner are discussing tagging on a holiday. At the time, our son will be around 2yo. We discussed taking him but figured a) it will be difficult (flight, accomodating naps, health implications-malaria etc), b) he won't remember it anyway.

We decided we could leave him with grandma and go on our own. At first I was super happy with this decision. Grandma is ace, and baby is great at being looked after by others. He takes to people v quickly. She lives in another country, so we'd take him there a few days in advance to settle him.

But now we are having second thoughts. Will he feel abandoned? Will he just be back in Europe all lonely and confused and miserable whilst we are off on our jaunt? Will we scar him?? Shall we just forget it, and figure we can always go again at some point in our lives?

 

[jakelab]

@perrero Girl, go. Your son will not remember this but you, you will. And remember, your marriage is important too. Go enjoy with ur husband!

 

[idomesmiler]

@perrero My parents always took time for trips just the 2 of them. Often piggy backing on business trips while we stayed with grandma.

We got bonding time with her and my parents got bonding time with each other.

Nowadays you can video call and send pictures, so you will have way more contact with your two year old than I did with my parents.

Plus you can bring them back cool gifts!!

You kid might be upset you are gone for a day, then they will adjust and be happy spending time with grandma, they won't really understand the concept of you going away, but it will be a learning experience for them too.

 

[satan1568]

@idomesmiler Expect some silence treatment on your return, but that usually brushes off in a couple on hours or with a few presents

 

[katrina2017]

@perrero Omg he will not feel abandoned, you'll have facetimes, he'll have a blast and love being with grandma being spoiled and having fun away from you. Healthy attachment with non parents is so important and essential! not abandonment!

I had big stays at my grandparents from 2 years old when my mum had a hard pregnancy with my younger sibling. I LOVED IT SOOO MUCH. And now I visit them as often as possible, my fav people

 

[perrero]

@katrina2017 Thank you, nice way to frame things!

 

[jimthebob]

@katrina2017 I echo this. Preemie brother meant I practically lived with my grandparents at 18m and I loved it. My Grandma is still one of the people I'm closest to. Go, it will be great all round!

Others will have more useful advice but I've seen some helpful stuff about ensuring Grandparents have necessary documents for medical care etc. Just in case.

 

[brooklyn1212]

@perrero I would not bring my 2 year old.

 

[jim48]

@perrero Has your son stayed with grandma for any length of time before?

 

[perrero]

@jim48 She stayed with us for many months to help when he was born (around 2mo to 8mo old). Then we flew back with her for another 2months (8mo to 10mo old). We are going again soon for 2months (will be 17mo to 19mo old), and probably again for at least 3w at Christmas. So she has spent lots of time with him, but interspersed with long breaks, and not without us being around.

 

[jim48]

@perrero Will grandma have other people around to help? My only concern would be that taking care of a toddler by yourself for 1-1.5 weeks is a flipping marathon. If grandma has plenty of help, I would be fine with leaving him to let your husband and you have a solo vacation!

 

[perrero]

@jim48 Yes, my SIL

 

[shiloh153]

@jim48 I had a similar question. Does your LO know grandma? You said she's ace - I was thinking you meant with him until I read that she lives in another country. If he doesn't know her, that would make me hesitate.

 

[jesusreigns777]

@jim48 This is my question. 7 days is a lot for an older person and certainly if it’s grandmother by herself. Like my parents can watch my daughter and we can do a long weekend without her, but they are wiped out when we get back. I feel like more than 3 or 4 days would be pushing it. But everyone’s situation is different.

 

[perrero]

@jesusreigns777 Yes good point. But her daughter basically lives with her and is a super hands on auntie! I have no qualms they will be fine with him. Its just whether he will be a sad baby!

 

[jesusreigns777]

@perrero Got it. I think your son will be fine! I’m sure he’ll be happy when you get back but kids are so in the moment I don’t think they really miss us outside of the time of drop off

 

[katrina2017]

@perrero We have a 1.5 year old and are expecting #2 this year and I’m slowly realising we won’t get a private break for years because it’s a lot easier to leave one child than multiple. Not to mention nobody in our circle is going to want to (or be capable of) babysitting a toddler and new baby at the same time.

I’d take the trip if I were you. 100%. You never know if you’ll get the opportunity again! Toddler will be fine.

 

[w34kn35s]

@perrero We did a 7 day trip when our kid was around the same age. I’ve been away for 3 days before no problem. Not going to lie, I struggled with being away for so long. I was sad and wanted to FaceTime him all the time and was frustrated when my in laws didn’t send enough pictures. Going forward I think my max time away would be 4-5 days. This may not be the same for you!

 

[amotz]

@w34kn35s This is how I feel too.

When we do a weekend getaway I usually don’t FaceTime because he ends up being upset and crying for us and then I get all depressy. Lol it’s not a fun feeling on vacation. But for a weekend it’s not a huge deal and my parents send me a million pics. It would def be hard for me to be gone longer because I would absolutely have to see his little face and I’m sure those face times would turn into some melt downs.

 

[naomi96j]

@perrero I just was gone for 10 days in Europe and left my 2.5 y/o with relatives. He did just fine! No regrets.