Question about interacting with children (31f)

[duvduv]

I've always loved interacting with kids. I have been babysitting since I was 11, worked in multiple day cares/ preschools and have had a few nanny jobs. I also attended uni for Early Childhood Education although I didn't finish. I don't have any of my own yet but I have a few "fake nieces" as I call my friends kids and my boyfriend of 2 years has 5 nieces under 4 that I adore.

Hanging out with children 1-5 is my favorite. They're developing at such a rapid speed that you can see changes literally overnight and learning is still fun! I have always loved to quiz kids on the basics of their age such as color, anatomy, animal sounds, etc and have never thought twice about it. I also try a game where you get toddlers to work on their consonants by singing, "lalalala", "bababa", "roorooroo", "soosoosoo" etc.

Today while visiting boyfriend's family I was doing the "lala" with the oldest (4yo) as her articulation needs a little bit of work. She just started pre-k this year and she's really picked up her speaking it's just not very clear yet. I made it fun and smile and laugh while doing it and kids seem to find it silly and fun. I asked my boyfriend tonight if what I did was rude and he said it could be taken wrong by certain people and I haven't been able to shake the shock since. I do not think I am better than any mother or judge their parenting in any way when I play with children like this. I never considered it as crossing a line but now I'm feeling anxious.

So what do you think, ladies/ gentlemen? Have I crossed the line? Should I reach out and apologize to all my mommy friends? Thanks!

As background, I, my brother and my cousin all had speech lessons in elementary. I had a trouble with my s's, my brother and cousin r's and I always found speech class kind of fun.

Also, It's not like I simply correct their speech, I'm on the floor with them most of the visit reading books and playing pretend. Kids usually love me and I leave them alone if they don't, lol.

 

[thechcicagobluecollarguy]

@duvduv Early childhood teacher here.

The best way to encourage a child to speak correctly? Speak to them correctly, don't speak to them like a baby.

Why are you insistent on "quizzing" them on those things? Have a conversation, make observations, talk about their day.

If a child pronounces a word wrong just say it back to them correctly and they'll usually correct themselves

For example...
Child: I want the lello crayon
You: the yellow crayon? Is that the one you wanted?
Child: yes the yellow one

Children will learn all these things at their own pace and through preschool and school. Time with friends and family is valuable in a different way as it's genuine human interaction.

I don't think you need to go back and apologise to your friends at all. Although I think it's always good to think about the 'why' of your interactions with these children.

As an early childhood teacher I'm constantly asking myself 'why?'. It always comes down to how would I like to be treated and spoken to as an adult - would I want someone to bombard me with questions about irrelevant things? Or would I want to have a conversation about things that are relevant to myself and the other person?

You're not being rude by doing this, I used to do this until I started putting myself into the shoes of children and pushing myself to understand why I defaulted to asking them about shapes and colours and animal noises instead of just being there and being open to any conversation that occured naturally (or didn't!).

 

[angel0019]

@thechcicagobluecollarguy Oh my yes! My oldest son is 3 and he says things like he knows the word but can't quite get it right. I'll repeat it back to him and he'll confirm that's what he meant. He'll tell me what he's doing, what his toys are saying, we'll have conversations about what going on around us. He talks baby to his brother (8 months) and I'll tell him that's he's learning to talk, speak normally to him. But honestly I think he finds the noises funny lol

 

[idontknowhatimdoing]

@duvduv It never worked when my kindergarten teachers quizzed me to know what I learnt only if not going home was brought up, which was stupid. No incentive, no reward, no sense, while I knew. Just no need to show off I knew. Just came off as threatening and hateful without any why.