Parenting big kids?

[simsodep8883]

We’ve got 3 kids (5, 3 and 1 y/o). We’re (non-urgently) considering having a fourth. I feel like I have a sense of what having one more would be like while they’re still young, but have trouble envisioning what the challenges will be as they get older (I suppose that’s true whether we have 3 or 4, actually.)

What’s life like for those of you with 3-4+ kids who are all/partly out of the infant/little kid stage? How do the parenting demands shift as they get older? Are there things that are particularly hard to juggle? Advice on how to prepare for those?

We’re loving the ages they are now, but is pretty intensive. Does it’s actually get less demanding, or is it just demanding in a different way? Thanks!

 

[preston354]

@simsodep8883 I have 4, they are 14,14, 15,15. You’ll find that suddenly you’re no longer a parent but a glorified taxi. Your calendar on your phone will always be yelling at you reminding you of an event, practice, appointment, assembly, school function, play date and everything in between. Then you’ll be chasing down emails and assignments from teachers and you’ll be sitting there looking at the latest organizational planner trying to find some way to make it all work so you can be on top of everything only to realize trying to plan anything around anything will just never work. And if you find a way to make it work someone’s going to throw a fever, puke or an infection of something at you, on a weekend after the pediatrician and local clinics close leaving you to scramble first thing Monday morning to sit on hold with your pediatrician for an hour. Then before you know if you’re dropping them off at a job and they suddenly need you less and you start missing those younger years.

 

[dnzundah]

@simsodep8883 I am just a bit ahead of you. Mine are 9, 7, 6 and 3. It has already gotten soffit to manage schedules and I have had to limit activities. I think it is healthy to choose, but also know it is going to get much harder. Most people I know carpool when possible and do a lot of dividing and conquering. Others choose to restrict activities more than we are willing to do.

 

[simsodep8883]

@dnzundah I feel like it’s easy now for us to say “oh, we just won’t do lots of activities”, but I wonder how realistic limiting that kind of thing will actually be. I’m an introvert, and as a kid I was maxed out at school + 1 activity at a time... but even that adds up quickly as you add kids!

 

[bygrace76]

@simsodep8883 We do a lot of activities but we choose things everyone will do then do them “in bulk.” We’ve done this with paino, swimming, horseback riding, skiing, & Girl Scouts.

 

[roberto1820]

@simsodep8883 I have 4 big kids ages 9, 11, 11 and 12 and I babysit my
niece and nephew every night who are 5 and 9. Having bigger kids is just demanding in a different way then when they are little. Our biggest issues are sassy attitudes and general messiness, plus how freaking much these kids eat lol. Our house is basically semi controlled chaos at all times. Things run pretty smoothly, shower times are one of the tougher things, but probably mostly because I have 3 girls, so it takes forever . We ended up having to get a vehicle that seats 8, so we could put the kids where there was a seat between them, because there were always fights in the car because they were too cramped. If you have any other questions, just let me know. Ultimately the difference between 3 and 4 isnt that big of a deal. I went from 2 kids to 4 within the last year and the jump from 2 to 3 was kinda rough, but 3 to 4 really wasn’t much different.