Not putting in effort

[jm001]

Tale as old as time with teenager. Freshman has been doing less than his best and came out of his very basic social studies class with a "c". Yeah I know, not the end of the world, but this is seriously bottom of the barrel for available freshman social studies classes. I also know there are about 6 kids in the classroom with an IEP (I'm a sub and was in the classroom a couple of weeks ago), so we are not talking higher level skills here. Son is definitely more than able to do the work. When I have contacted the teacher and found out when the test was and bullied him into studying he made a solid B on the test. His homework has also been lackluster as well.

This isn't the only class he struggled, as his biology grade was lacking and yet again forced studying brought it up and he sqeaked out a b-. Son is evasive on schedule and will not notify me of his tests so forced studying is a difficult thing to do unless I hound his teachers.

The entire semester I have ridden his case about the grades and have warned him there is going to be consequences for not making a B . Alas I have chosen to take his phone from 8:00 pm to 6:00 am nightly probably at least until the quarter (9 weeks). I honestly think it's too little but I'm hoping it's enough.

He has also been instructed he will spend at least 30 minutes a day, 3 days before tests studying with extra time if he doesn't have the material down on the last night.

So I guess what I want to know how is this going to backfire on me? I get good grades need to come intrinsically yadda yada. However I see so many kids - my own included - giving less than half assed efforts I'm stuck as to what to do. What carrot or stick have you used? Previous years have been $50 for straight A's and he has tried for it and occasionally gotten the money but evidently he doesn't even care to make an effort to get there anymore.

 

[foolishness]

@jm001 If it was my kid, I’d get him a tutor. It’s a forced 1-2x/wk sit down to go over his subjects/ upcoming test etc. and make him be accountable to a third party. I learned a long time ago that with my kids personality, it’s worth the time and money to outsource even if we could eventually teach her the same thing ourselves. It saves all of us frustration that lets our family time be positive. And when the tutor assigns him study/hw hours then you’re not making him study, you’re following the tutors instructions. Just my 2 cents.

 

[mournfulwatcher]

@jm001 I have a 16 yr old FS in the same exact boat - history is a bitch man. I hinge his ability to partake in organized after school sports/activities and his allowance on his school performance as well as following house rules and expectations. We treat school as his job. He has one job, right now, do well in school. He MUST maintain at least a C+ in all classes to be allowed to do school sports. If he is missing assignments and/or lies about his homework he loses his allowance and gets grounded for the weekend. HOWEVER, when he does well (which he has actually maintained a B+ average since starting this year) he is rewarded with $20 per A and $10 per B, per trimester, and we will pay for extra stuff like when he wants to go to the tramp park, movies, wants stuff at the store etc. So we reward good behavior, well, but we do have clear consequences if the bare minimum isnt met. I met with his teachers for conferences and they now alert me via email, weekly, if assignments are outstanding and I ask him daily about homework and offer my assistance every day in case he needs it. ps he has an IEP.

 

[flickabee]

@jm001 Same boat here too - well, similar enough - How is it gonna backfire? He could sneak the phone and you'd have another issue. He could dig his heels in and get 25s instead of just 60s. He could sleep all day, etc...

I like to try to be prepared with contingency plans too, but I don't know that it's possible. Especially with the smart ones.

I have noticed that the typical reward/punishment system has never worked. What I have seen work is the how of presenting the lessons. I started home-schooling and noticed a difference - certainly still not perfect - but my son does much better with a one-on-one situation where he feels connected to the teacher (me lol). I also noticed when my son had a friend over - I still held class - and having that good peer pressure really helped too.

Wishing the best...