keithfin007
New member
Hoping for some insight-
My 9yo has been doing some interesting things with food habits lately.
Incident 1) Had taken several regular sizes candy bars from closet (my husband works for a candy company and these weren’t actually to be consumed but to be given to customers -9 yo knows this). Hid the wrappers under his dresser. Had a lovely, non-threatening talk with him, made the candy leas accessible. No big deal. We laughed about it, told him he could be honest with me, admitted I’d done that when I was his age too.
Incident 2- 1.5 weeks later - Found 3 more candy wrappers hidden in his books??? When approached about it this time, I felt like he wasn’t truthful with me. Lied and said he ate 1 per week over the last 4 weeks. But the incident had to take place after incident 1. After this, had a more serious talk. Discussed his habits at school and how sometimes sugary foods make you more hungry. Made some small, discreet changes to snacks for school (more fruits, veggies and protein) and added more protein to breakfast. Made a snack plate in the afternoon with healthy choices out and accessible, which he loves. Still not forbidding any foods but trying to teach good habits, like eat a balanced meals, healthy snacks, stay hydrated and have some yummy treats every now and again.
Incident 3- About a week after the above changes were made, we found about 10 uneaten clementines and 6 Clif bars (both of which he requested, picked out and packed himself-me trying to give him some autonomy and control over the foods he eats) thrown away in his bathroom trash can. Now mind you, he didn’t do such a great job hiding this.
What’s going on here? I feel like our family has a healthy balance of nutritious eating with treats sprinkled in. I’ve never denied him sweets but I limit them. Like, you can have cake after a nutritious dinner but we don’t eat cake for breakfast, which I believe to be sensible.
As far as his personality, he is highly intelligent, very sensitive, probably adhd (has been red flagged for this, but no impulsive/hyperactivity-mainly loss of focus, organization, forgetfulness,etc.), very active, aims to please, never gets in trouble at school or spo
Not that he’s perfect. From a very young age, his preschool teachers and us noticed he was very quick/manipulative almost with words to get out of trouble. He can come back very quickly with a rebuttal that is hard to dispute and has been capable of this since he was 3. Has a tendency to tell little lies. I believe this is due to his sensitive nature and fear of getting in trouble. I picture him being the kind of teen that all the moms want their daughters to date bc he’s such a “good boy” but he def has a sneaky side when nobody is watching, lol! The kid that nobody would ever suspect!
So, how do I proceed here? What’s going on with him? Or, do all kids kind of go through this at some point? Is there another issue going on, like feeling no control over his life or a developmental stage to exert some control/rebellion? I want to resolve this in a way that still allows him a nutritious diet with some fun treats here and there, without causing a food complex or even worse, an eating disorder.
TY for any feedback.
My 9yo has been doing some interesting things with food habits lately.
Incident 1) Had taken several regular sizes candy bars from closet (my husband works for a candy company and these weren’t actually to be consumed but to be given to customers -9 yo knows this). Hid the wrappers under his dresser. Had a lovely, non-threatening talk with him, made the candy leas accessible. No big deal. We laughed about it, told him he could be honest with me, admitted I’d done that when I was his age too.
Incident 2- 1.5 weeks later - Found 3 more candy wrappers hidden in his books??? When approached about it this time, I felt like he wasn’t truthful with me. Lied and said he ate 1 per week over the last 4 weeks. But the incident had to take place after incident 1. After this, had a more serious talk. Discussed his habits at school and how sometimes sugary foods make you more hungry. Made some small, discreet changes to snacks for school (more fruits, veggies and protein) and added more protein to breakfast. Made a snack plate in the afternoon with healthy choices out and accessible, which he loves. Still not forbidding any foods but trying to teach good habits, like eat a balanced meals, healthy snacks, stay hydrated and have some yummy treats every now and again.
Incident 3- About a week after the above changes were made, we found about 10 uneaten clementines and 6 Clif bars (both of which he requested, picked out and packed himself-me trying to give him some autonomy and control over the foods he eats) thrown away in his bathroom trash can. Now mind you, he didn’t do such a great job hiding this.
What’s going on here? I feel like our family has a healthy balance of nutritious eating with treats sprinkled in. I’ve never denied him sweets but I limit them. Like, you can have cake after a nutritious dinner but we don’t eat cake for breakfast, which I believe to be sensible.
As far as his personality, he is highly intelligent, very sensitive, probably adhd (has been red flagged for this, but no impulsive/hyperactivity-mainly loss of focus, organization, forgetfulness,etc.), very active, aims to please, never gets in trouble at school or spo
Not that he’s perfect. From a very young age, his preschool teachers and us noticed he was very quick/manipulative almost with words to get out of trouble. He can come back very quickly with a rebuttal that is hard to dispute and has been capable of this since he was 3. Has a tendency to tell little lies. I believe this is due to his sensitive nature and fear of getting in trouble. I picture him being the kind of teen that all the moms want their daughters to date bc he’s such a “good boy” but he def has a sneaky side when nobody is watching, lol! The kid that nobody would ever suspect!
So, how do I proceed here? What’s going on with him? Or, do all kids kind of go through this at some point? Is there another issue going on, like feeling no control over his life or a developmental stage to exert some control/rebellion? I want to resolve this in a way that still allows him a nutritious diet with some fun treats here and there, without causing a food complex or even worse, an eating disorder.
TY for any feedback.