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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @kmoreno I’ll look into it!! Thank you
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @becomingabeliever I’ve definitely been in therapy for years and am a therapist myself, which is why I’m so frustrated I cannot figure this out despite trying very hard!!!
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @kemar I really appreciate this context, especially about Dr Becky. Makes sense how she got big. But also now this is incredibly frustrating. I am upset I wasted all this time and wish I had found this stuff in the first place. I’ll check out the link you recommended and unfollow all these...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @kemar I think I completely agree and the person telling me about the ABCs / that pattern illuminated that trying to be attuned to her while she is dysregulated is teaching her that she gets more attention. Made total sense! what I’m confused about is why all the gentle parenting stuff...
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    Another mom told me I have a fat a** today

    @sakura656 Honestly this lady is so crazy and her kid such a brat and I would laugh and let it roll off me. What insanity.
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @cutin This is VERY helpful and validating. I felt like maybe I was missing somethin lol.
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @waterflow There’s many times where she is on the verge of a meltdown and I don’t know how to respond. Meant she screams about something that she is frustrated about, like she yells about not being able to get a toy to work. Lately I’ve just been taking to ignoring it per the ABC class but the...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @waterflow I don’t even remotely care about gentle parenting or need to do gentle parenting. I updated my post to reflect that. I appreciate you sharing that resource! I actually read the explosive child and while the idea was super helpful, it still doesn’t explain how to actually manage the...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @havevisions How does she respond when you do that? My kid will scream at me and then sometimes start throwing things
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @samuela2g I really appreciate your comment here! I think you’re right, I forget about communicating that aspect of safety.
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @smartgeek I feel like we give her a normal amount of attention you know? I don’t know
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @cutin I really appreciate you writing all this down! I think what’s hard is offering any physical coregulation you mentioned makes it worse. Maybe after she has reached the peak and then come down a little bit I can offer her burrito time or something, but nothing helps in the moment. Most of...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @thickandthin I can’t be too close to her or too obvious! I have tried being near her numerous times and taking my own deep breaths, and she yells at me to stop taking deep breaths haha
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @cutin I really appreciate your comment, especially the last paragraph was very helpful. I wonder if she may be on the adhd spectrum, as my husband definitely has it. But she is only 3 so I try not to worry about that and she has been very developmentally typical in all other areas. Sharing how...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @continualseeker I totally understand that gentle parenting is also dog training! Now I get that anyways. When someone said when you give them attention it reinforces their behavior I totally get that now. My issue is that I feel like all the gentle parenting experts that swear by it do not even...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @cutin I appreciate you explaining all that out. Thank you!
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @emmy0922 I’ve looked up the difference between those three but it is still unclear to me what I’m supposed to do in the moments when she is super escalated. When I try to talk to her or ask her anything or reflect her anything, she just screams back and it seems to escalate her more. Giving...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @dustinx When do you get him from his room?
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @ebuzi I also wanted to add- I realized through these comments where I feel stuck is I feel like attachment parenting focuses on attuning to your child while they’re dysregulated and focusing on the connection between you two, whereas behaviorism emphasizes how that can reinforce the negative...
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    Parent Child Coercive Cycle Vs attachment/gentle parenting?

    @ebuzi This is SUPER helpful, exactly what I was looking for. “Ignore the behavior, not the child” is helpful, as well as that you always tell them what you’re doing if you take space or leave. When you say “I am going to get up or walk away,” how does she respond and what do you do then? My...
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