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@jackiecline A potential compromise here could be gift bags? Birthday girl gets presents, all other kids (not just your girls) get a bad with candy, a small stuffie, and a balloon.

@kwoodlay One thing that works for me and my wife is 1:1 time with the kiddo. Every few nights we invite him to stay up past his bedtime and watch a movie with us in our bed. Telling him we are taking that away really makes him change his time quickly when he is being defiant.