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@12antoniobu Oh I’m so sorry you suffered/are suffering from an ED. 😞 I hope you’re in a place you can seek treatment if you still need it. Learning independence at a safe pace in a safe space is definitely important for our D14. I hope the next 4 years of HS she’ll keep making progress & learn...

@mmt635 Thanks for taking time to reply out of concern. That's a super common mis-conception about eating disorders, and one I might have agreed with before starting this awful journey. Wasn't really here to discuss the ED, but mentioned it because I recognize why my supervision is more extreme...

@dorcas_12 Me either, and not really striving to be one apparently!

@freeinnocentspirit Not exactly- the kissing is whatever & between them- provided the info for context. It’s more that he was drinking and using pot when making lame choices like that at such a young age that concerns me, and I wonder if I should mention it to his mom. I don’t know her well...

Great discussion, appreciate the views on both sides. As far as the cheating, I also feel it’s up to her to navigate, and I stay out of the relationship other than cheerleader or shoulder to cry on. We’ve stopped enabling them to hang out as often the last couple weeks but some of that is...

@helpguy Hope my kid grows into a thoughtful 17 y/o like you are. I’m so sorry you’ve lost friends to drugs already. 💔 Sending a sympathetic mama hug your way. Thank you for taking time to share your perspective, it means a lot hearing from a young adult like yourself.

@onefollows D did tell me about the cheating all on her own, the poor thing - it was devastating in the way only the first heartbreak can be. :( It's the drunk & high I'm mostly concerned with, and whether or not proactively saying anything to his parent now that they're back together makes any...

@logann I’m so sorry you went through that! Thanks for sharing, I think it’s brave and you may help someone avoid that situation. Your assessment of how some parents feel about stuff is right on. Testing the water if I get the chance is the right idea.

@kayus Thanks, yes, we've actually talked about those issues since she was at least in 5th grade, if not earlier. She knows since we got her the phone at 12 we had the option to read things. We never really bothered until recently, sadly, due to other circumstances beyond any of our control...

@has56 My D is firmly aware of this already, and it's a great point. Before this whole situation and before I actually read her texts, she wouldn't post much personal to snapchat b/c she said everyone always took screen shots and used them against people. It's ugly out there in the digital world.

@bianca123 This sounds like a good balance. I'll check out that app. So sorry you went through a crisis with your son. :( We have a bit of one ourselves, I never used to bother reading texts either, even though it was an option. Wishing you the best.

I should say right away I know this is what happened because I monitor my daughter’s phone and texts. She is 100% aware of this and it’s the rule in our house until she can pay for her own phone. She knows that he was in an altered state, but it doesn’t bother her like the kissing 2 other girls...