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@rvanengen10 You have no obligation to this man. It's a waste of time trying to co-parent with someone who is not the father, your son doesn't want to visit, and he is likely going to fade out of your kid's life anyway.

@junipermints Well when he throws a fit tell him his options are: He keeps the weekend, and takes the kid to/from the sports day. He has the kid after sports day on Saturday (or prior to it if it's on Sunday). He misses another weekend with his kid. It's his choice how he wants to deal with it

@megbot Bitch about it to my friends. Especially other mom-friends, double especially if they're also dealing with co-parenting BS. I switched to parallel parenting for a while, because he overstepped from being annoying into truly being a cruel asshole. He's made amends a bit, so we're on...

@thebrokenman30 Since you're going to court in a month, this might be a "pick your battles" kind of situation. I can understand wanting to make plans, but it doesn't seem worth it to engage with him on this. Are there any truly crucial decisions that can't wait until June?

@samiammk It wouldn't be a bad idea to examine how you're treating your child and how you word things. "If you're going to be like this, then..." is phrasing he picked up from one or both of his parents. He sees it as appropriate to hurt someone's feelings when they hurt his, and that's how your...

@claire19 Yeah, I think the stepbro needs to be in therapy or they need to do family counseling for a certain amount of time. Then phase in visits, possibly monitored by you. It was super brave for your daughter to do what she did, but there needs to be some sort of adult accountability, and I...

@claire19 Even if you kept 50/50, you know they'd lose connection with (and respect for) their dad if he allowed this to continue. Have they not already gotten the stepbrother in therapy? I think conditions on going back to shared custody, and a gradual phase-in, sounds reasonable, but you're...

@harpazo56 I think it sounds like this is a great opportunity to lay down the framework about how introducing new people/integrating step-parents should go. He's not in the thick of the introduction yet, so he can think about it more objectively, and so can you. Frankly, her intentions are none...

@tsomnlie You're not wrong. It's time to talk to a lawyer.

@joan316 Go to court. Work out a custody order that he agrees to. And get a babysitter or someone for your kid to hang out with, because it doesn't sound like he'll agree to every weekend. You're not being unreasonable for wanting him to stick to your agreement, but he's not unreasonable for...

@msmia Well, it depends on the circumstances. The age of the kids, the distance of the pumpkin patch, how invested they are in it. I wouldn't take my kid to a pumpkin patch a second time because we don't live especially close, so it's an all-day effort and my kid wouldn't like having to spend...

@msmia Even if they only go pumpkin picking once...so what? I mean, I love Halloween and all the associated activities. I know my kid would not be jazzed about making the long drive to the pumpkin patch twice. If my ex took my kid to the pumpkin patch before I could, I would be disappointed, for...

@traveller2wisdom Frankly, I'd focus on finding a path towards getting a parenting plan together and moving out. You're not going to get him to change. He's absolutely being unfair & selfish, but that's why you're not with him anymore. Trying to get your ex to change isn't going to work, but...

@lalei Then that will be his problem to deal with. A judge isn't going to be like "oh, well, he didn't participate so I guess he defeated the system and can have whatever he wants!"