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@joyfuljourney OP is talking about dictating her X’s time with their kids. One parent doesn’t get to decide how the other parent spends their time with the kids. If they can work something out — like the boys play baseball — that’s great. Otherwise, no. If it doesn’t work for dad it doesn’t...

@joyfuljourney I’m guessing if you, personally, had to try and convince someone it wouldn’t go well. Commenting “you suck” isn’t the convincing argument you think it is ;) Also — and I know this is tough — what’s easy for you may not be in the cards for someone. “Lazy”could be working long...

@joyfuljourney And what if he doesn’t agree that 3/4 practices a week plus all day games and tournaments is what’s best for the kids? I sure as hell don’t think it’s best for my kid.

@ozpants “All he has to do is bring them to practice” is a big lift is he works long hours, has a tough commute, wants to do other things with his time, doesn’t agree that sports are the the option for building character, and on and on. We don’t get to decide what someone else’s burden is...

@darrenclay It’s you trying to control how your ex spends his time with the kids, OP. You’re the one trying to control something you have no business trying to control — your co-parent’s time.

@pangurban Yep. I feel this completely.

@darrenclay Ok so I’m the “no to sports” parent and I’ve got a lot of reasons. My ex has tried, repeatedly, to get me to sign our 7yo up for very demanding team sports. We’re talking traveling, hours and hours out of my time with my child, huge (for me) financial obligations. He even got his...

@jackaru Absolutely. The kids needs and wants always come first. But just because my child wants me to be a full time soccer mom/theater mom/equestrian mom doesn’t mean It’s possible. I’ll also point out that needs and wants are different. Kids need love, affection, and the basic necessities to...

@jackaru That’s a good point. However, the only fact for me is that mom is scheduling things on dads time. It doesn’t matter what OP thinks is best, what she wants for the kids, or what they’re passionate about. None of us gets to decide what happens on the coparent’s time.

@thatgirlinjapan The kids might also be “passionate” about an activity they do on dad’s time they OP is leaving out or doesn’t know about. Maybe dad and the boys play an interactive game together on weeknights or have a standing movie date to go see something fun. Also we don’t know if dad has...

@jackaru What if he doesn’t want to show up and would rather spend that time with his kids? Y’all are ignoring the fact that it’s his scheduled time with his children. OP can pay for it and say that she’ll take the kids to practice and games, but that’s not the issue. Maybe he wants to spend his...

@zanemalindeal Both. We started the account when divorced mid 2020. Lots of stimulus checks went in as well as gift $ from family for child. It’s unclear who’s contributed exactly what without looking at deposits deeper.

@katrina2017 I mean, it’s not my money. My concern is that it’s child’s money and X took half of it with no notice or accountability to our child.

@kitty123 Yeah definitely. It was sort of a panic moment…divorce initiated in 2019 and finalized mid 2020 when things were still locked down. There was stimulus $$ to deposit and we needed a place right away. I closed the account today.

@jwb725 I suggested we change the withdrawal permissions from “or” to “and” meaning both of us would need to give permission. X’s response was to accuse me of being “difficult”. I’m not sure if I can legally request information about the account since X owns it, but it’s for child.

@hallbee66 Yeah separate accounts for child is definitely the next step. I realize they can take $, but am concerned they did without discussing anything with me. It’s not X’s $, it’s child’s. My real concern is the $ isn’t going to a college fund, but towards whatever expense X has and they’re...

@montse811 It’s a holdover from when we were married. My concern is that X stole child’s $. I’m not concerned about what they’re doing with their money, but this is child’s.

About six weeks ago X withdrew, then replaced a large sum ($2000+) in our child’s joint savings account. X messaged and said it was a bank error. Three days ago, I noticed that child’s account was again missing $, this time drained by half. This second withdrawal happened two weeks ago. All...