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@guje I'm thinking of it as similar to a probation violation, but what would you suggest instead? I'm definitely open to reasonable alternatives. That's why I posted.

@beginningtowonder What would you suggest instead? I'm just looking for a big enough incentive for her to stay sober.

@davidjohnn51 She would immediately lose all visitation if she fails on anything. It's a one strike policy.

@guje The reason I'm pushing for this is so that if there is a next incident, we don't have to start from scratch. I've also told her I'm very open to putting something in that shows that if she remains in compliance for a period of time she can petition for half custody back.

@chrissy777 She's had issues before, including being forced into rehab once. If she's not okay with the solution, we will let the court decide.

@youngwolf I've already said it is until our son is 18. Thanks!

@bobw To answer your question, yes, this would be the new court approved custody arrangement with a revised custody order in place. I have already told her that if she wants less time temporarily or permanently I am happy to accommodate it, so far, she does not.

@bobw Thankfully her pattern with alcohol is not one of daily drinking, but periodic out of control binges. Therefore, we should be in the safe period for at least a few months. However, if she doesn't agree by Monday I probably will go in for some short-term orders until we get a hearing date...

@katrina2017 There's others as well. The one I'm pushing for has her do a monitored swab test via video conference 3 random times per month. She has to FedEx the swab back to the center after they watch her put it in a sealed container that breaks if you tamper with it after closing. They are...

@katrina2017 Yes. There's even a phone app with an attachment nowadays.

@lbauman She's the type of alcoholic who binges periodically and has out of control episodes rather than drinking every day, but yes. I'm so sorry that you went through what was clearly worse.

My ex-wife filed for divorce a year and a half ago. Neither of us cheated or did anything wrong, but our relationship wasn't working. We share 50/50 custody of our 5 year old son. Until now, I have always bragged about how well both of us have handled the divorce and custody issues. Last week...