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    Age gap; 3 or 4 years?

    @loumay Mine have a 3.5 year age gap. I'm one of four kids myself, and most of us had four-year age gaps. Personally, I don't think there's a ton of difference between ages 3 & 4 except potentially for potty trained status (much more likely to have successfully implemented it by age 4 as opposed...
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    Managing bedtimes?

    @kaiti I was one of four kids, and there was no scenario in which both of my parents were ever showing up at an activity! Not possible. Once I was old enough, I was usually driving a younger sibling to one of their activities. And as a kid I don't remember caring that only one parent was around...
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    Managing bedtimes?

    @kaiti We have evening activities for our kids most nights during the week so I hear you, though (right now) all of them are over by 6:30 at the latest. If there was something from 6-7, we'd grab take-out on the way home or have frozen dinners from Trader Joe's or Costco ready to heat up as soon...
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    Daycare operating on a “first-come-first-served” basis?

    @lostsoul_ My son's old daycare had this happen a lot, beginning with Covid hitting. It was and is very challenging to find sufficient staff at many centers, which means they either have to restrict the number of kids who come in or else fully shut down the room because of ratios. I had to move...
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    Logistical issues

    @chrissygerzen We have two and it is super-stressful for many reasons, the main ones being lack of any family support so it's all on us. At least IME going from one kid to two didn't double the stress; it exponentially magnified it. We have also done different pick-ups/drop-offs for going on...
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    We make too much to get any assistance and not enough to live. I literally don’t know what we are going to do

    @donaldspede Re childcare, check and see if your state has any kind of childcare assistance (call 211 as a start). Depending on how parenting goes for you and your mental health, you might look into caring for an additional child if the current job you have doesn't pay enough for your own...
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    A matter of when not if…

    @muya To your last sentence, there are still many days where I wish I'd stopped at one. Those days are fewer and farther between than they used to be, but they still exist. But, the thing you and I did with our 3yos was parent (unplanned) through Covid. And I'm here to say that my hard kid was...
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    Exploring the idea of OAD

    @katrina2017 She (my first) was fun at age 2, and life was starting to feel better and more liveable to the point that I could imagine doing it all again. It also felt like having a kid had exploded my life beyond recognition anyway, so in a sense the cost of just one felt like a lot - like...
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    "bAbIeS aRe EaSy AfTeR 3 mOnThS"..

    @flowernbloom Babies are kind of awful; anyone who says they are easy is either one of those people who magically loves babies and/or has/had an easy baby. Solidarity! I don't think it actually gets better until they're toddlers, but the good news is that - on the sleep front - once they're 4+...
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    A matter of when not if…

    @leah_talbot I had severe PPD for two solid years after my first, and my kids have a 3.5 year age gap. (Ended up with severe PPD after the second too, but so it goes.) Anyway, I like that age gap! I would have waited a little longer even, but I had my second at 40 as it was. We did have one year...
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    Exploring the idea of OAD

    @rainbow42 I have two, and from that lens would say there are tons of positives to being OAD. But I agree, you don't need to decide now. When I look at our friends who stopped at one kid, their lives are vastly less complicated (especially in the context of two parents who're together), because...
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